General Babble

[cineater]

Every birthday and every holiday as a kid he kept waiting for it to be something to show he was loved.  I totally get it.  He was let down every time.  Now he acts like it's no big deal.  Yet, he gets up in the morning and wants to open his gifts from his wife right now.  I walk in the door with gifts and yeah lets open them now.     It's hard to tell if he likes his gifts or the celebration but if you look close, he's trying to control himself and the tears.  He won't hear from his folks today, they haven't changed.  Even though we're doing it up big, he's still waiting for them to acknowledge him.  He turned 36.

Sometimes I wonder if what we do doesn't cause him more pain.  Just a reminder of what should have been done.  I have had other kids who get mad at what we do, misdirected anger.  We can't make up for those people but understand, we appreciate you, you mean something to us.

[cineater]

He let himself be excited.  Texting me pictures or showing me he's using his gifts.  The pressure is over, he got through the day, they didn't contact him.  He doesn't have to wonder if they are going to let him down or maybe hope they won't.  This shit is hard to not let bother you.  And it's not like his parents can blame it on how they were raised, it's not.  I feel sorry for them, wrapped up in their own problems and missing something that could have been really good in their life.  It's nice to give your kid that great birthday with presents but it's the day to day interaction with them that doesn't cost a thing and gives your life meaning.

[cineater]

A boy and his dog and his fox.    Turned the big nine months.

I was thinking the other night, as much as I didn't want a cell phone, it did let me text the whole night with my daughter when she was in the labor.  And I do get pictures all the time.  And messages to come over and babysit if I'm not doing anything, usually when I'm sleeping. 

Such a cutie with the best disposition.  In new situations he takes in the lay of the land before diving right in.  He's pretty much happy to go anywhere with you and do anything.  That's his mommy right there.  She was really into Barney.  He's into Miss Rachael, kids music.  And we're all walking around singing kids songs with the motions.   

[cineater]

Turned into music night.    You know where they sing "pumped a lot of tang down in New Orleans"?  Tang is slang for gasoline.  The astronauts drank tang, an orange drink, the wonder of it's time, science improvement on orange juice, good for you.  In areas where petroleum was big business and employed everybody they called gasoline tang.

I wondering why the doctor is jumping me to the 6 month shot for osteoporosis and not putting me on the weekly pill.  I'm old but is my bone loss more than people my age?  I had mostly mild and one moderate in the left hip.  The pharmacist wondered the same thing.  But the insurance company gave special approval for it, that says something.  I've had one fracture in my whole life.  I was pretty drunk.  The guy tried to throw me over his shoulder and we both went down.  Fractured collar bone.  The side effects hit me in all the places I just kind of live with off and on, don't make them worse.

I've turned into a pretty good little pill popper.  Another advantage of the cell phone, it reminds you to take your meds.  The only pill I was ever any good at taking and really good, was birth control.     Those other pills you don't really know you have an issue and it just doesn't occur to you to take a pill.  There was that other pill the doctor accused me of being a junkie for.  I was taking them for migraines and they didn't help, no matter how many I popped.  He didn't really believe in migraines, let alone 3 day ones.  It was the last time I sought migraine care, just lived with them.  The guy before him just wanted to load me up with morphine.  Had that once, wonderful drug.    I probably should have went that route.

[cineater]

Well shit, I forgot to do the laundry.  It's midnight and there are no sheets on the bed.  Music night continues.  I'm having fun with it. 

[cineater]

Came home down a dollar and up two bottles of wine.  I'm a poor gambler but a good drunk.   

[cineater]

Woke up at 11.  My first thought is, anybody looking for me?  I'd like to roll over and go back to sleep but the phone's not on the charger, better check that.  There's a couple of people who are going to be looking for me today.  It's all quiet but I'm still sneaking around the house like I'm going to get caught sleeping in.   

[cineater]

One bottle of wine has found a home.  I wouldn't have taken them except they were thrust upon me and the former drunk I am still thinks there's a value there that I shouldn't just drop them in the trash.

[cineater]

My granddaughter is turning 14.  She shyly tells me she's into self care.  She wants a facial.  Oh sweetheart, you've got a grandma and an aunt and we know what your saying.     She's gone girly on us and she's getting the princess treatment!  We're going to the spa.   

[cineater]

It took me a long time to write something on this guy's obituary page. He died back in 2009.  I felt it was time to say something.  Let his family know there was a time.  A time when he was headed to West Point.  The top of his class.  The rich kid with everything and a future.  Not the fuck up they knew.  I'm sure there was some relief when he died and a lot of anger.  Let that carry them through until it doesn't hurt so much.  Don't know if his kids will see my post.  It's okay to put all that aside and love him now.  There must have been some love there.  He was their dad and he was my first love.  Not everybody thinks of him poorly.  At least not back when there was a time.

[cineater]

This is kind of cool with the electric company and the new smart meter.  They send me a text that my usage was up yesterday.  Of course it was but I can up the temp in the house.  I was kind of cold anyway.  I'm sitting at 72.  A good 25 degrees lower than outside.  I just don't mess with where it's set but thanks for mentioning it, I will adjust it.

I have the new meter so they can adjust it automatically.  Not installing it during a heat wave just in case something fucks up there.  It came with a new power strip.  "Load sensing technology"  Not really understanding how that works but I'm to connect my computer to it.  Apparently all the other plug in stuff that goes with that won't draw power until the computer is active.  That's if I'm understanding it right.  One more shot at fixing the printer when I do that.

Was running around on their site seeing what all this new information can tell me.  Got to a chart comparing my usage month by month to the average household and energy efficient households.  I kick both their butts.  I'm way below the line until you get to December through March.  It's Christmas lights and plant lights.  I shoot a little bit above them.

Really, I don't think I needed this new equipment.  Data analysis from the new meter shows I'm not the problem.  It's the rest of "you people" running up the usage charges I'm stuck with.   

[cineater]

I was just returning the kid's cable equipment because they changed providers.  I walked out of there with a new modem, 5 more cable channels and a landline for $10/month less then what I currently pay.  I don't know the number to the landline and after 6 channels I didn't know what other 9 channels to chose.  I'm not sure if they just reactivate the old landline or if they are coming out to lay a new line.  What did I do? 

Tonight I will try to hook up all this new equipment and get the printer to work.  I can do this, right?  Not the thermostat though, not risking the AC, I need to keep my cool.

[cineater]

That didn't work.  Got it connected but couldn't find my modem on my internet connection.  Texted for help, really can't I just talk to you?  We were doing fine until he wanted me to screw in the black cable.  I didn't get one of those with the equipment, just the yellow phone cord thing.  My screw cable is white and goes into the router.  I was real proud to know the difference between my modem and my router.    It was at that point he told me I have to have a service call.  I hope this isn't me.  Good news is they are coming first thing in the morning and I was able to reconnect the old modem and here I am.

I have a bad feeling he's going to tell me my router is too old for their new equipment.  And the guy failed to tell me there would be a one time $25 charge for this little upgrade.

Every once in a while you have to fuck with technology.  It's like diaherra, it's a mess but it will eventually turn to shit you have to deal with everyday.  

The new power cord is connected.  They failed to realize that all this tech stuff doesn't have the same size electrical plug as say a lamp.  All kinds of strange shapes that don't fit nicely in a row in the sockets.  Haven't got to the printer yet.

[cineater]

This commercial is annoying the fuck out of me.  New miracle drug "that will make you forget you have migraine".  Look you either have a migraine or you have migraines.  You don't have migraine, put the fucking a or s in the appropriate place.     There's a lot of anger that goes along with seeking treatment for migraines.  One of which is getting medical professionals to believe they are a thing that has nothing to do with your inability to handle stress, you're not psychologically crippled or drug seeking. 

My favorite one was the doctor who thought I was depressed because I broke up with a boyfriend 6 months earlier.  I didn't mention it, it was one of his questions.  Never asked me how important that relationship was to me, it wasn't.  Look I'm sitting her with my head in my hands because it hurts.  The med he gave me helped me sleep through a bear tearing up camp outside of my tent though.  You know, I might have panicked. 

[cineater]

It was me.  I don't know the difference between a modem and a router.  I was replacing the wrong box.   

I have this thing about not letting technology intimidate me.  When I worked I knew all the ins and outs about how to work our computer program, people called me for help.  Believe me it was one poorly programmed system. Lowest bidder thing.  For a while there, the tech guys knew my voice.  After a while though, they would have to put in a work order for the problems I was finding and fix the system.  Outside of work, I'm really not that interested.  I don't keep up with shit or even check it out until it's forced upon me.  You know it's interesting but I really don't have a use for it, something more to fuck with and run up the electric bill.  I'll try but I'm a fuck up when it comes to technology.   

[cineater]

I have two very large and heavy birthday presents, workout bench and 40 pounds worth of weights.  I can barely lift them and they are blukey.  They have to go in the bed of the truck to get them to the birthday boy.  I get the brainy idea to wrap them in black, plastic trash bags.  If it rains, they won't get wet and the wind won't tear birthday paper.  We can use those to clean up the party mess too, double duty.  Works except trash bags are really slippery.     Try to slip your hand under that or hold it against your chest.  The bag is moving around on the box.  The box is slipping out of my grasp.  It was an adventure.  "You're gifts are in the back of the truck, I'm not moving them again."

[cineater]

Mike had the old gas tank to the Camaro sitting in front of his chair at the garage.  The 20 year old neighbor, Devin, sitting next to him.  Mike's explaining he drained the old gas out and has most of the fumes out of it.  He just needs to blow some more air into it to make sure the fumes are out and wash it out.  Before he can stop him, Devin whips out his lighter and holds it lit over the opening to the tank.  It explodes, goes 25 feet into the air and comes back down on the hood of Mike's perfectly kept, doesn't have a mark on it, Challenger!  Where it had been a rectangle gas tank, it is now a round ball.  Fortunately, the tank stayed together or they would have sprayed with metal.

The hood of the Challenger has dents.  The windshield just got missed.  And since everybody is okay, I almost wet my pants when he told me the story.   

[cineater]

Shit!  Tim told Jim last night at pinball Greg is going to get him to remodel the place and Brian is going to sell all the pinball machines off.  No more pinball league.

Okay but, Greg is only part owner in the place, surely the other investors aren't going to agree to that especially Tim doing the work.  They've taken Greg out of management because he doesn't know how to run a business.  That business doesn't have enough clients to justify a renovation and expansion and it won't even if they did it.  Tim, is not even a good used car salesman.  The people who work for him are alcoholics and drug addicts.  Any fool who hires him is an idiot.  Jim's in total agreement.  But if he knows Brian is selling the machines something must be brewing.  There's this whole little drama that goes on behind the scene at that place.

We can just join league at Two Plumbers.  Haven't ever been there but it's close enough.  Kind of like this place though.  It's small and off the beaten track.

I'm on target for the playoffs.  Sitting in second place.  One more session to go.

[cineater]

I'm the cool grandma.  My granddaughter got out of school early.  Got lunch and then we went to the spa.  All her friends were envious.  She got a facial, eyebrows and a haircut.  We have to go back for the highlights.  The place is a beauty school.  They have all these practice heads laying around.  They are really creepy.  So while I waited I texted my daughter pics of the heads.   

She was telling me how uncomfortable she is with the men her mother dates.  Some examples, her mother took her along to meet a guy for the first time at his storage locker.  They got there, he had his shirt off and there was a bed in the storage locker.  Probably wasn't expecting her to bring kids along.  She complains her mother keeps inviting these first time meets directly to the house.  Her mother had her dancing with her in front of the guy who gets up and grabs her around the waist.  She tells her mother that made her uncomfortable and the mother tells her she's overreacting.  I tell her no she wasn't and to trust her instincts.  Not the first time all the alarms are going off in my head about the mother's dating choices.

She's told another adult female friend who said if anything happens, she would get a couple of guys and hunt the date down and beat him up.  Ah no, safety plan in place before that happens.  I told her to text me anytime and I would come right over or send her aunt or uncle.  Tomorrow we'll talk more about how all that will work.  How to make an excuse to lock yourself in the bathroom while you're waiting for me to get there.  A pocket full of things she can say to remove herself.  Never feel bad you're texting me, I got to see you and I'm always happy about that.  I'd have a little chat with the mother but I don't want her telling the kid not to tell me stuff.  We've had chats before when the mother tells me this stuff directly.   

Tomorrow is the girl's shopping trip.  If her friends were jealous about today, not done yet, I'm a really good grandma.   

And then starting Sunday I have mom until Thursday.  No idea why she is so excited to come to my house.  She has all these things she wants to do that she can do at her place but doesn't because she says she's too old.  I have no idea what I'm feeding her.  I'm a grazer, haven't fixed a meal in years.     I'm hoping she doesn't trip over a cat and I return her to my sister in good shape.  My sister isn't coming back until the following Monday so I'm hoping she can stay home alone for those few days with just me checking on her Sunday.  Last time my sister went out of town, mom got her dizzy spell and I had to drop everything and go stay with her.  I just want to get in my seat at the GNR concert.     I can juggle everything else.  It all happens at once.

[cineater]

5 hours of shopping     I'm too old.  Here, just take my credit card and I'll take the baby outside and wait for you.  Out of all of that I got a refill for my car air freshener.  The granddaughter had a good time.  She changed into her new outfit right out of the store.  She didn't think she wanted jeans but she got a pair and several people asked her where she got them.  Never did find the bra shop but we got her covered head to toe.  Big crowds and lots of sales.  Poor quality clothing if you ask me but people were buying.

I opened up several new credit cards.  You get a nice discount when you do that and your teller gets something too.  I never active the cards, just pay the bill.  The next time I go in and make a big purchase I get another card.  They give you 30 to 40 percent discounts for opening the cards.  Put that credit score to work!