Rock N' Roll Joe songs!!!!!!!!!!!

[Jdog0830]

Soon I am gonna post some of the songs I have done and hell some ones I started on but are stuck on.
I am thinking at least the stuff for Rock N' Roll Joe (first song!!!) will be on at least in two days just got to copy it from the master notebook at my house (where I put all my stuff that I think will sound the best!!!!).
Since people are intersted in what they have seen I will post all the stuff I have done so far.
If you got comments, question, advice, or whatever just let me know and post whatever.
Hope you guys will enjoy it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!





Joe

[Jdog0830]

I want to give you guys a idea of what I want Rock N' Roll Joe to sound like.
Think of it as a ACDC song lirics, mixed with the feel of Dont Dam Me and some Mr Brownstone.

Honestly I havent looked at it for like a year. It seems that the song is not complete at all compared to what I thought it was. So I am going to work on it as soon as I am done with my ACT stuff (I am a junor in High School and real need to study for that ACT shit )

So I will give you guys a little taste of it though since I dont want to keep you all waiting forever.






Joe

[Jdog0830]

Yeah im Rock N' Roll Joe
Fuck lets get to the show
Got some hookers and blow and im ready to go


O Yeah im Rock N' Roll Joe already knows you cant run from shit when your loaded ya know

I got a whole bag o trouble so ya better know

Thats in no particular order of how the song goes just parts that I am more satisfyed with and most likely there will be a bunch of changes made to it when compared to the finished product.
Sorry that it does not have a bunch more in it for you all...  I will get on it as soon as my shit is together probobly after school is out at the vary least.
But let me know what you guys think ok!!!








Joe

[Jdog0830]

Just want to say I got at least 2 other songs that I was working on a little while after I thought of Rock N' Roll Joe.

Caged Bird- It has a obously blues sound that I want it to have. It is more in order than RNRJ but still needs some tweeking for it.

Feeling like a caged bird
Feeling like Ill just o never learn
Dosent really matter to you
For every winner four or five lose yeah!



Gonna Change the World- Its really up in the air on how I want it to sound. This one needs more work as well.


Im gonna Change this world till my last breath
Gonna change the world got to do it fast
Yeah we can make it last







Joe

[CheapJon]

Hey Joe, I have some feedback

for "gonna change the world" the lyrics don't really flow you know. I can't imagine those 3 lines working together, I'm not sure you'll have a melody that can work with it. I guess it'll be some kind of a ballad?
Let me tell you when I first read the lyrics to This I love. It was days before I actually listened to the song but I could still feel a flow and imagined a melody along with the lyrics when I read them. It sounded nothing like the actual song but the lyrics had that flow. I still remember the melody that I imagined TIL.
 Of course it's too early to tell when you've only written 3 lines but have that in mind when you try to complete it. The subject of "changing the world" rarely appeals to me, unless it's man in the mirror by the great MJ. Probably because I don't believe in one person changing the world. It's too cheesy and too 1985 for my taste. Lots of people believe in it though and you're not writing that song for me so you don't really need to think about that.

On RnRJ. It seems like the lyrics are more about fantasy than the real deal, which I'm not a fan of. It could might as well be about dragons and medieval stuff. The real deal rarely lasts, fakes never last. So if you want to at least have a chance of making it, make it real.
As you said the lines are in no particular order there but I still can't make much if any sense of it, maybe it's because Swedish is my first language but if you want some Swedish fans, you better think about that .

in Caged Bird I can actually feel some what of a melody, pretty 80's. Whitesnake actually, don't know why

Caged bird stands out among your songs, even if I have no idea of any actual melodys and maybe what I just said only makes sense to me but I figured I'd share anyway.


EDIT: oh and that "give those hoes the old push and squeeze" .. Don't disrespect your ladies as "hoes" and I think i've heard push and squeze before...

[Jdog0830]

Ok thats all good RNRJ actually has alot more in it its just getting hard to weave through all the good and the bad. Yeah I need to work on that shit alot it was actually just made to be something that just sounds fun like some kind of a cool party kind of song but its basicly weaving through the bull shit to find the dimond in the rough.

Gonna Change The World is more of a song you would understand if you had the instrumental in it. In my head the instrimentals complment the song and I am sure I can make that a reality.

Caged Bird by far though is going to feel the most real for me. I am sure other people can relate to it even more than I can but its gonna be about stuff how I feel.


But all of this stuff is back in the working process so who knows how RNRJ or any of my songs turn out in the end all I know is the flow I felt from them feels right as long as I have that then I am sure I can get a real good finished product!!!






Joe

[Sin Cut]

I've seen lots of lyrics and also been posting them myself.

One thing is to write a kickass lyrics and whole another thing is to make it into a song. Anyone can write a some words.

Lyrics don't impress me, but when I hear even a rough-demo that sounds good, hell, that does.

Writing lyrics is a way of therapy for myself. To make it work with music is work.

So here's my feedback;
First of all it's "instrumental" not "instimental". Instimental sounds like some disease making insects go nuts.

RnRJ
Hell, the guy sounds like a fucker, harrasing me in pub and even worse he turn out to be a freeloading fucker who thinks too much of himself.
Hookers and blow? Know what?! What makes your trouble more important than mine? Yes, I'd definetly punch Rock n' Roll Joe. Seems like a loser who can get shit done on his own for me.

However I like the "you cant run from shit when your loaded" it has a nice double meaning. But the thing that RnR-Joe has the biggest problems is such a cliche.


Caged Bird
You say it has a bluesy sound, ok.
The first three lines could be something emo's listen while they cut themselves, but the sudden "for every winner every four or five lose yeah!" seems out of context.
It's like you start don't cry and cut an paste nightrain in it.

The song doesn't tell what the caged bird doesn't learn, is the birdie just too dumb for school or does he maybe do the same fuck-ups, the same way, time after time after time?

The last one, well sound like a dying man on his sickbed suddenly realizing he need to change the world and fast 'cos he's dying.
I don't know about the "last" tho, just name one change that lasted? Sound like you just put something there to go with the fast?


Look, I'm not trying to shoot you down, but if you're really going to do some of these songs stop attention-whoring with some one verse lyrics and post something tangible.

[Jdog0830]

Yeah I have thought about that issue concerning Caged Bird and its not all gonna be blues. Just a good part of it. Now that I think about it the intro might even end out like Dead Horse.

RNRJ is just kind of when I think about it more of a story of a big rocker in a great band (not me). Kinda someone like Axl you know except with some different issues and a different story.
Hell with any luck it could be me except the parts about the drug abuse and the hookers

Its all a big process and yeah I do take alot of enjoyment from writing all this.

I could have sworn I was writing a balid though but I cant find it.




Joe

[D]

Ive been writing lyrics etc for over 16 years and my only advice is to just keep writing writing writing

its a craft and u gotta find what u do well and perfect it.

best advice i can give is to be as original as possible. u have to be "YOU" and write as "YOU" as said above, u have to be authentic.

if u haven't lived it, don't write it.

[Jdog0830]

I put a little part of myself in every song I write. How much of myself it depends.
But its all writen by me!




Joe

[D]

stick with it. u are passionate about it. do what u love and don't let anybody tell u not to do it.

Remember, when u put out a song, u are guaranteed to have 75 percent of people hate it.So u can't let that discourage u.

[Jdog0830]

Thanks D that helps!!!!
 



Joe

[D]

Thanks D that helps!!!!
 



Joe

plus u are very young, so the more  do it, the better u are going to get!

the toughest thing in the world is to read or hear criticism. I know that 100 people can like a song of mine but if one person tells me i suck or i am this or that, it fucking cuts like a knife.

so after a while, u stop taking things so personally. cause think about it, to me Axl is one of the greatest musicians alive and there are people who think he sucks. so how can u expect everyone to like something u do?

Michael Jackson has the highest selling CD of all time which is around 50 million... there are billions in the world who didn't buy it.

so its like i said. Take criticism but also take it with a grain of salt, cause u have to consider your target audience.

another thing i have learned from the internet also is, there are a lot of hobby guitar players as i call them. they can play u every GNR,Metallica etc etc song in the world but can't write one single song of their own and they are full of hate. Had a dude one time tell me a song of mine sucked right, so i challenged him to post something of his so i could see how its "done" fucker posted a Bush GLycerine cover...... LOL GTFO! haha.

so embrace the fact u write original material cause that impresses me a hell of a lot more than someone playing covers.

[Jdog0830]

Yep its not easy to be a writer.
I hate those tools that dont do anything orrignal ever.
If you dont write any of your own music and say your like the greatest at whatever no one would really care since your just copying what someone else wrote and just rearanging it.

And thats not being true to yourself at all.


Joe

[LunsJail]

If you dont write any of your own music and say your like the greatest at whatever no one would really care since your just copying what someone else wrote and just rearanging it.

And thats not being true to yourself at all.


Joe

Ok, some constructive criticism based on what you just said: You might want to check out the "hookers and blow" line and decide if that is something that is really true to your life or if you've heard it somewhere else. It could come off kind of phony otherwise.

[Sin Cut]

If you dont write any of your own music and say your like the greatest at whatever no one would really care since your just copying what someone else wrote and just rearanging it.

And thats not being true to yourself at all.


Joe

Ok, some constructive criticism based on what you just said: You might want to check out the "hookers and blow" line and decide if that is something that is really true to your life or if you've heard it somewhere else. It could come off kind of phony otherwise.

 

btw I remember reading in Heroin Diaries that Nikki Sixx had no problem getting ideas from other peoples songs and using them himself.

[Jdog0830]

If you dont write any of your own music and say your like the greatest at whatever no one would really care since your just copying what someone else wrote and just rearanging it.

And thats not being true to yourself at all.


Joe

Ok, some constructive criticism based on what you just said: You might want to check out the "hookers and blow" line and decide if that is something that is really true to your life or if you've heard it somewhere else. It could come off kind of phony otherwise.

Like I said before all my songs have a part of me in it. I only gave you guys a small taste of what I thought sounded cool from the songs.





Joe

[Jdog0830]

Planning on jaming with some of my friends today since I am not going to be able to run at the track meet since I hurt my knee when my friend accdently kicked it durring soccer practice and it just locks up whenever I run.


I will be sure to tell you guys about how it goes!!!




Joe

[D]

If you dont write any of your own music and say your like the greatest at whatever no one would really care since your just copying what someone else wrote and just rearanging it.

And thats not being true to yourself at all.


Joe

Ok, some constructive criticism based on what you just said: You might want to check out the "hookers and blow" line and decide if that is something that is really true to your life or if you've heard it somewhere else. It could come off kind of phony otherwise.

 

btw I remember reading in Heroin Diaries that Nikki Sixx had no problem getting ideas from other peoples songs and using them himself.

I think it was Paul stanley that said, if u are gonna rip off or steal something,just make sure u steal a diamond!

[Layne Staley's Sunglasses]

so its like i said. Take criticism but also take it with a grain of salt, cause u have to consider your target audience.

another thing i have learned from the internet also is, there are a lot of hobby guitar players as i call them. they can play u every GNR,Metallica etc etc song in the world but can't write one single song of their own and they are full of hate. Had a dude one time tell me a song of mine sucked right, so i challenged him to post something of his so i could see how its "done" fucker posted a Bush GLycerine cover...... LOL GTFO! haha.

Gunner80?