Relationship Question

[GunnerOne 84]

Hello fellow Gunners. I had a simple question involving a girl I hope I could get some advice on.

I am currently a Junior in College. I am without a girlfriend recently for the first time since I started here. A few weeks ago, I met a girl that I found to be very cute. We have hung out some and have plans to continue to do so in the future. I have found myself extremely attracted to her.

However, she started a relationship with a guy less than a week before we met. I have never once been one to meddle in another person's affairs, but I really don't want to see this girl get away.

My question is whether I should pursue, and if I should what I should do. I like this girl alot but would have to be a dick, and if I should leave it alone then I will. I have not really been in this situation so I thought I'd ask my friends here for some help.

Thanks.

[Natasha23]

I say go for it.  She just started dating this guy a week ago, so they're not engaged or anything.  I think you should pursue her as long as you don't do anything evil or horribly deceptive regarding this other guy.  If you have plans to continue hanging out in the future, than I think you still have one foot in the door. 

Also, you could just be honest with this girl and say you like her and you want to date her.  Tell her you want to throw your hat in the ring.

Good luck!

[GNRreunioneventually]

i can't help ya much on that note there but if i were you i'd let it play out and hopefully something happens where you can expose this other dude for the dick he is (may be (idk)).

but buck up man i sure you'll get much advise here


Good luck what ever happens

[GunnerOne 84]

No, I don't plan to do anything terrible to the other guy. I don't even want her to cheat, I just want to get with her after they are over. I've thought about telling her but not sure if it's the best idea.

Thanks for the help so far!

[Chief]

I totally agree with this post.. i say go for it and see what happens, hopefully its good!

I say go for it.  She just started dating this guy a week ago, so they're not engaged or anything.  I think you should pursue her as long as you don't do anything evil or horribly deceptive regarding this other guy.  If you have plans to continue hanging out in the future, than I think you still have one foot in the door. 

Also, you could just be honest with this girl and say you like her and you want to date her.  Tell her you want to throw your hat in the ring.

Good luck!

[Lisa]

Just be her friend...it doesn't sound like you are too intense yet or if they are yet...play it out and see what happens. In the meantime, show her what a great guy you are. Chicks really dig guys who can make them laugh and put them at ease. Be yourself, hang out with her when you get the chance and make her feel good about hanging with you. Try not to talk shit about the other guy cuz that could throw up red flags for her. Be her friend and if she sees you how you want her too, she may change her mind about the other guy. Keep yourself definately in the picture

[Axl4Prez2004]

Lisa's right.  Take it from an old-timer like me.  Be yourself.  Be a gentleman.  Have fun man, you're in college. 

If she just started going out with this guy, it's not like they are "exclusive."  Make yourself available and see how it plays out.

My best advice to you would be...never settle.  I never did, and it totally paid off.  You are going to be attracted to a lot of chicks throughout your life.  Does she seem like the kind of person you're compatible with?  A lot of guys make the mistake of hooking up with anything that gives them wood...bad mistake.  I wish you luck dude!   

[GunnerOne 84]

Thanks man.

I am always making the effort to be a gentleman when I am around her or talking to her. I am almost positive she has no idea I am interested. I definitely don't want to settle here, I did that last time around. I had no intention of getting with anyone for a while, she just happened along and I was hooked instantly.

She seems very compatible with me, although we don't know each other to well yet. We do have a lot of the same interests and invite each other to different things. At this point I would just love to take her out one night and see how it would go. But she is gorgeous and extremely nice, and would hate to not have a shot at her.

[Axl4Prez2004]

Best of luck to ya!  I'm psyched for you.  Sounds like you've got a good outlook on things.

"I had no intention of getting with anyone for a while..."  Isn't it funny how that works?  When ya least expect it...POW!  It hits ya.  Women rock.   

[GunnerOne 84]

Best of luck to ya!  I'm psyched for you.  Sounds like you've got a good outlook on things.

"I had no intention of getting with anyone for a while..."  Isn't it funny how that works?  When ya least expect it...POW!  It hits ya.  Women rock.   

Yes it definitetly does. She stopped over my place one night for a party and got all dressed up-way over dressed for our party but I didn't mind haha , and I was just floored by her. And I was just like uh oh I'm in trouble now.

Women do rock. 

[Sin Cut]

Gentleman?

This is where you fail.

Other than that listen to lisa.

I try to explain the gentleman thing; I got friends who are real nice to girls, a.k.a. gentleman, they don't get the pursue.

Not one. The women they have ain't due pursue.

I've had my moments. Actually I've told my friends "that one I will have." And I have. Every time. So maybe I havent been able to keep 'em, but I've had them. And I'm not talking one night either.

So I haven't done this by being a "gentleman", but rather going for the bad boy-thing. You all know how the saying goes.

[polluxlm]

Gentleman?

This is where you fail.

Other than that listen to lisa.

I try to explain the gentleman thing; I got friends who are real nice to girls, a.k.a. gentleman, they don't get the pursue.

Not one. The women they have ain't due pursue.

I've had my moments. Actually I've told my friends "that one I will have." And I have. Every time. So maybe I havent been able to keep 'em, but I've had them. And I'm not talking one night either.

So I haven't done this by being a "gentleman", but rather going for the bad boy-thing. You all know how the saying goes.

This guy speaks the truth.

Boys, never take advice from women on how to get women.

[rds.06]

Gentleman?

This is where you fail.

Other than that listen to lisa.

I try to explain the gentleman thing; I got friends who are real nice to girls, a.k.a. gentleman, they don't get the pursue.

Not one. The women they have ain't due pursue.

I've had my moments. Actually I've told my friends "that one I will have." And I have. Every time. So maybe I havent been able to keep 'em, but I've had them. And I'm not talking one night either.

So I haven't done this by being a "gentleman", but rather going for the bad boy-thing. You all know how the saying goes.

Boys, never take advice from women on how to get women.

Very true.

My advice is, play it cool, become friendly with her but not to friendly, you dont want her to enjoy your friendship so much that she doesnt want to ruin it by getting in a relationship with you.

Make her laugh and let her no your available, that means do not talk to her about girls you were with or girls you might like. Just let her no your single. Thus giving her an alternative to her present boyfriend.

Dont try and fuck things up between herself and her boyfriend for a while, as its in its early days and chances are it will fall apart naturally, if you do try mess things up make sure your not obivious in doing so.

My golden rule is not to become to friendly with her as this has happened to me a few times and your left with a hot girl that just wants to be friends, and that is the worst outcome. ?

If you get bored with waiting get her & yourself drunk and just tell her how you feel. If she turns you down blame the drink. If all else fails use your friendship to hook up with some of her friends.

Good luck. Keep us updated. ? ?

[GunnerOne 84]

Well, I think have a decent plan of attack. We are supposed to get together twice this week and hang out. I'd like to tell her how I feel and see what she says to me.

However, we are both involved in a co-ed athletic team here at the university, which is how we met. We were a female short and we didn't know her but she stepped in and really helped us out. Our first playoff game is the 26th, and I i really don't want to mess up the team for this, cause I Don't want to screw the people that play for me.

So I figure I will wait until we are eliminated or win the title (hopefully this) and let her know then. It will give me some more time to feel her out, and not make things messy. Once the season ends I can tell her, and if it goes ugly I guess we can part ways.

Anyone think I'm crazy or is this a good idea? I don't ever stress about females, but I'm pretty much a wreck with this one. Thanks.

[Axl4Prez2004]

Gentleman?

This is where you fail.

Other than that listen to lisa.

I try to explain the gentleman thing; I got friends who are real nice to girls, a.k.a. gentleman, they don't get the pursue.

Not one. The women they have ain't due pursue.

I've had my moments. Actually I've told my friends "that one I will have." And I have. Every time. So maybe I havent been able to keep 'em, but I've had them. And I'm not talking one night either.

So I haven't done this by being a "gentleman", but rather going for the bad boy-thing. You all know how the saying goes.

Sin Cut, I love ya man!  In a non-gay way of course.   Sin Cut reminds me a lot of a buddy of mine.  He scores.  He's the guy who when he sets his mind to it, gets the girl almost every time.  I'm not that kind of guy.  I'm selective almost to a fault.

Anyway, I guess what I'm saying is that if you want to get girls, Sin Cut's the man with the best advice.  If you want to get "thee" girl the "right" way (long-term of course) I like my approach.

Being in college affords you a great opportunity to get to know girls really well before you're even "dating."  It's awesome.  To be able to connect on a friend level first is amazing.

By the way, you brought back great memories.  My wife and I were teammates back in college,...co-ed football.  Great stuff, battles between dorms, etc.  Great memories.   

[Mr. Dick Purple]

Don't let her go dude, go talk to her, ask her questions about herself how's she doing in life what colours she likes stuff like that, she will talk a lot, and I mean A LOT, so pay attention cause in one of those talking she'll give you hint of what she really wants now, study her body language if she notice that you're checking her out she wont know exactly what you want, and she will like the intrigue, anyway other thing take her dancing, or to some bar a few beers is ok, maybe a little chit chat, always make her talk so you can know what she wants and how she is. Remember you are like a salesmen and you're selling yourself   

Peace and good luck.

[mrlee]

Gentleman?

This is where you fail.

Other than that listen to lisa.

I try to explain the gentleman thing; I got friends who are real nice to girls, a.k.a. gentleman, they don't get the pursue.

Not one. The women they have ain't due pursue.

I've had my moments. Actually I've told my friends "that one I will have." And I have. Every time. So maybe I havent been able to keep 'em, but I've had them. And I'm not talking one night either.

So I haven't done this by being a "gentleman", but rather going for the bad boy-thing. You all know how the saying goes.

lol i was  expecting you to go.

"right this is my advice, tell the guy he pisses you off, kick his ass and ride off with the girl into the night!"

[fuckin crazy]

I'm going to get hammered for this, but what the hell. Dude, you're a Junior in college. What are you ...23 or 24? Hose everything you can get your hands on. If you have to spend over a couple of weeks on it, move on to the next. Keep a couple in play at all times. When you get older, you will look back on these days with fondness. They will all be out of your life by then anyway.

[SLCPUNK]

I concur.

BIGTIME.

[mallrat]

Just make sure you keep your swimmers in their own pool.