Work-obsessed friends

[Africa]

Alright, first off, I'm making this post because I need to vent somewhere, no other reason. I have two friends that are constantly on my case about getting a job, and it's becoming hella annoying. Before you think I'm some slob, let me give you the story.

I'm 23 years old, I've worked in the past and I started some studies at university in the fall of 2006, which didn't work out because I wasn't motivated for it at all, I simply made the wrong choice and found out that this was not something that I wanted to spend my life on. So I dropped out and started looking for a job, this was in late September. Finding work proved to be much harder than I had thought, I went around town, dropping off applications to different stores, hoping they'd need some help, so that I would have something to do until I start my new studies this fall (which this time I am way more confident and excited about), but I didn't hear a thing. September, October and November went, still didn't hear a thing, and during this time these two friends (who both work and can't stop talking about how good they are that actually work) began hassling me about trying harder. Each time I see them (I consider them both close friends) they would ask "So how is the job hunt going? Any luck?" and I had to report back every time that, no, still no luck but I will continue trying.

Well, Christmas came and went and at this point I had applyed for a fucking bunch of jobs, and there was no reason I shouldn't get one, I think I made a good first impression and all, and I was beginning to become fed up with the lack of response, but these two wouldn't stop asking. It became an annoyance, after all this is my life, not theirs. I started explaining to them, in hopes of getting them to relax with the questions, that I will let them know when I hear something, and I even said that at this point I'm just tired of this whole thing, I'll live my life, I got some money to live on until I get a job, so we will see what happens. Yet they wouldn't stop. Now it's March and my perspective on things have changed. I don't even want a job that bad, it's not that long until summer starts and in August I will begin my studies, and I've got a lot of other things to focus on until then. I work on my music every day and I'm currently involved in a lot of girl trouble (won't even bother going into details), so I've got enough on my hands, not like I'm lying around wasting my life, I've got plans for both my education and my music and at this point I'm both motivated for the future and happy with my life, and frankly (contrary to what these two believe) work isn't everything, I'm doing fine without working at a fucking supermarket. I got plans and I'm looking forward to a fresh start this summer.

Well, the questions still haven't stopped and I've had it with their obsession that I find work, it's not reasonable. It all culminated last week when one of my friends told me there was an available job as a phone operator at his work place, and I said thanks, maybe I will look into it (trying my best to not really show interest), but there is no way I want to spend my days working as a phone operator, even if it's just for a few months. But he wasn't happy with the answer, he became almost aggressive. It was ridicilous. "I think you SHOULD apply for this one, I will let my boss know and I will recommend you!" and I'm like "Fine, whatever." Well, since then he hasn't stopped calling me about it. I don't even bother picking up anymore, he is obsessed. He texts me "Well have you applied yet? Call me when you do". Fuck, what is their problem? Did I miss something? Is this my life or theirs? When I'm with them I try changing the subject (you know, into normal conversation) but no, they have to persist that I find work and hassle me about it constantly. What the fuck? Have you guys ever experienced this? These two are so mad at me not working that I'm beginning to think it all boils down to jealousy. There is no other logical explanation. Their lives consist of work, sleep, shit, eat, work, sleep, shit, eat, while I'm kicking it and having a good time, looking forward to my future and having a good time. I'm thinking that must be it. "It's not fair that I work and he doesn't, he has a better life than me and he's not even working, it's not how things are supposed to be!" - That must be their inner thoughts right there. It's sad when people are so caught up in this conformed, staked out lifestyle that they can't handle that other people choose to live their life differently. They simply won't accept it. Talk about close-mindedness. Well, my rant is done, thanks for listening, and if anyone has had similar experiences or just have opinions on this ridicilous behavior, shoot.

[25]

Next time anyone brings it up simply state that you're not looking for a job right now. If that doesn't satisfy them, start harassing them to quit their jobs and stay home. When they rattle off the list of reasons why they have to work tell them that you don't have those problems. Finally, if they still won't take the hint, tell them to get a second job - they clearly have too much free-time on their hands.

[Africa]

Haha, that's some good advice right there bro, I should just start telling them to fuck off and try changing their own lives if they are this bitter about me not living the same boring life they live. It's not how friendships are supposed to be like, it's ridicilous.

[The Dog]

It sounds like they only have your best interests in mind, but they should realize that you are going to do your own thing.  If you are truly not going to look for a job than just explain that to them.  Let me ask you this, do they ask you to go out and do fun things but you can't b/c you don't have the cash?  Maybe they want you working so you can do all the fun things they do. 

I was out of work for a period of time and my friends actively helped me look for jobs and it was very much appreciated.  Like I said, they probably just think they're looking out for you.

[monkeychow]

they most likely mean well, but i can relate to your experience.

I was unemployed at one stage and everyone starts to  get on your case about it. To me it was kinda like that song "no one knows you when your down and out" but with me it was more like "no one likes you when your down and out"

I later ended up getting a good job and now everyone likes me again.

[Axl4Prez2004]

I don't understand how folks can afford to live without working.  Personally, I'm a worker bee.  I have to work.  Work = security.  If you can afford food, housing, and clothing, I guess you've got it made.  Look on the positive side of things in regard to your buddies.  They're trying to help you out.   

[Africa]

I don't understand how folks can afford to live without working.? Personally, I'm a worker bee.? I have to work.? Work = security.? If you can afford food, housing, and clothing, I guess you've got it made.? Look on the positive side of things in regard to your buddies.? They're trying to help you out.? ?

I guess, but they should accept the fact that I've got other things to focus on right now, instead of saying I should do this and that before thinking of other stuff. It just gets damn tiresome, not like I tell them how to live their lives. And i can afford it because I currently live at home, it's a very cheap way of living until I can afford otherwise.