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The Jungle
The Joke Thread
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Topic: The Joke Thread (Read 35632 times)
Gaymo, the Hobbit
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Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #160 on:
March 09, 2006, 11:52:50 AM »
knock knock..
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The only son of a bitch with enough piss, vinegar and kill-?em-all attitude to shove an M-80 up rock?s collective ass right now is Axl Rose.
[LA Weekly]
Markus Asraelius
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Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #161 on:
March 09, 2006, 12:11:31 PM »
Who's there?
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Gaymo, the Hobbit
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Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #162 on:
March 09, 2006, 12:19:11 PM »
Dishes
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The only son of a bitch with enough piss, vinegar and kill-?em-all attitude to shove an M-80 up rock?s collective ass right now is Axl Rose.
[LA Weekly]
Markus Asraelius
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Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #163 on:
March 09, 2006, 12:54:06 PM »
Dishes who?
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Gaymo, the Hobbit
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Re: The Joke Thread
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Reply #164 on:
March 09, 2006, 12:57:43 PM »
Dishes the police, open up!
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The only son of a bitch with enough piss, vinegar and kill-?em-all attitude to shove an M-80 up rock?s collective ass right now is Axl Rose.
[LA Weekly]
Goldie
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Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #165 on:
March 10, 2006, 05:56:29 AM »
And I was told my joke was bad!!
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Kujo
I wonder why we listen to poets,when nobody gives a fuck
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Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #166 on:
March 10, 2006, 01:16:21 PM »
Yo mama's so stupid, she thinks Taco Bell is a Mexican Phone Company
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Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #167 on:
March 10, 2006, 01:21:55 PM »
Quote from: Megaguns on March 03, 2006, 05:51:14 AM
Quote from: MR W,AXL ROSE on March 01, 2006, 09:51:29 PM
i met a girl the other day.she had a tattoo of a seashell on her inner thigh.it was cool coz if you put your ear on it,you couldnt hear the seaside but you could smell it?
hahahahaha, dirty dirt stuff...... lol?
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Gaymo, the Hobbit
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Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #168 on:
March 10, 2006, 01:24:24 PM »
What'S the difference between a stork?
Both legs are equally long, especially the right one..
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The only son of a bitch with enough piss, vinegar and kill-?em-all attitude to shove an M-80 up rock?s collective ass right now is Axl Rose.
[LA Weekly]
Markus Asraelius
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Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #169 on:
March 10, 2006, 06:04:03 PM »
I can't believe this thread has been going on for a year now!
Well, here's a joke to keep it alive
Funny Business
A man is opening a restaurant and he asks one of his workers to come up with a name for it.
The man tells Al, one of his workers, that he will name the resaurant after the first thing Al sees when he goes out the door.
Al walks outside and the first thing he saw was a girl named Lucy and he saw her legs. He told the man, and so the restaurant was named Lucy's Legs. The man was so impressed that he said the next day Al could get a free drink.
The next day Al comes a bit early and a policeman walks by and notices Al waiting there. The policeman asks, "What are you doing?"
Al says, "I'm waiting for Lucy's legs to open so I can get a drink."
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Sakib
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Batman is sexy
Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #170 on:
March 11, 2006, 03:51:52 PM »
Quote from: Markus Asraelius on March 10, 2006, 06:04:03 PM
I can't believe this thread has been going on for a year now!
Well, here's a joke to keep it alive
Funny Business
A man is opening a restaurant and he asks one of his workers to come up with a name for it.
The man tells Al, one of his workers, that he will name the resaurant after the first thing Al sees when he goes out the door.
Al walks outside and the first thing he saw was a girl named Lucy and he saw her legs. He told the man, and so the restaurant was named Lucy's Legs. The man was so impressed that he said the next day Al could get a free drink.
The next day Al comes a bit early and a policeman walks by and notices Al waiting there. The policeman asks, "What are you doing?"
Al says, "I'm waiting for Lucy's legs to open so I can get a drink."
stupidly funny
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Excuse me standing on one leg, I'm half-caste. Explain yuself wha u mean when u say half-caste, u mean when picasso, mix red and green is a half caste canvas?
MoombaBiotch
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Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #171 on:
March 12, 2006, 12:58:42 AM »
Guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. Sits down at the bar, the monkey wanders around. Guy orders a drink. Bartender starts watching the monkey. Monkey jumps up on the pool table and picks up a ball. Eats it. Bartender says, "Holy shit! Fucking crazy ass monkey just ate one of my balls!" Guy says, "Aw man, I'm really sorry, I'll pay you for the damage." He pays the bartender, gets his monkey, and leaves. A few days later, comes back in with the monkey. He sits down at the bar and orders a drink. The bartender starts watchin' the monkey real close, cause he doesn't want to have anything else destroyed. Monkey jumps up on the end of the bar, starts taking grapes out of a bowl, puttin em in his asshole, and then eatin em. Bartender says, "What the hell is that crazy monkey doin now, he's stickin grapes up his butt and then eatin em." Man says, "Yeah, ever since the other day he won't eat anything without measuring it first."
Oh, yeah, forgot to mention that the name of the bar was Synergy.
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makane
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Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #172 on:
March 13, 2006, 12:44:35 PM »
http://youtube.com/watch?v=nUKo_RXQa_k&search=standup%20comedy
Hes a good standup comedian.
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YagetoutonyourownAndyoutakeallthatyouownAndyouforgetaboutyourhomeAndthenyou'rejustfuckin'gone!
RichardNixon
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Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #173 on:
March 13, 2006, 01:07:41 PM »
Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a pimple?
A: A pimple wait's until you're 13 before it comes on your face.
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Chelle
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Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #174 on:
March 13, 2006, 01:18:15 PM »
Quote from: RichardNixon on March 13, 2006, 01:07:41 PM
Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a pimple?
A: A pimple wait's until you're 13 before it comes on your face.
Richard Nixon wouldn't know a good joke if it bit him in the ass.
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"She was queen for about an hour...? after that, shit got sour... She took all I ever had.? No sign of guilt.? No feeling of bad, no..."
Markus Asraelius
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Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #175 on:
March 13, 2006, 02:14:15 PM »
Quote from: RichardNixon on March 13, 2006, 01:07:41 PM
Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a pimple?
A: A pimple wait's until you're 13 before it comes on your face.
Ruthless!
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RichardNixon
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Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #176 on:
March 13, 2006, 02:21:12 PM »
Quote from: Chelle on March 13, 2006, 01:18:15 PM
Quote from: RichardNixon on March 13, 2006, 01:07:41 PM
Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a pimple?
A: A pimple wait's until you're 13 before it comes on your face.
Richard Nixon wouldn't know a good joke if it bit him in the ass.?
I thought it was a good one.
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Chelle
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Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #177 on:
March 13, 2006, 05:46:19 PM »
Quote from: RichardNixon on March 13, 2006, 02:21:12 PM
Quote from: Chelle on March 13, 2006, 01:18:15 PM
Quote from: RichardNixon on March 13, 2006, 01:07:41 PM
Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a pimple?
A: A pimple wait's until you're 13 before it comes on your face.
Richard Nixon wouldn't know a good joke if it bit him in the ass.?
I thought it was a good one.?
My point
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"She was queen for about an hour...? after that, shit got sour... She took all I ever had.? No sign of guilt.? No feeling of bad, no..."
Backslash
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Use Your Allusion
Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #178 on:
March 15, 2006, 08:32:43 PM »
Q: What's big, green, and eats rocks???
A: a big, green rock-eater!
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SuperMike
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Re: The Joke Thread
«
Reply #179 on:
March 15, 2006, 10:34:35 PM »
Yo mama's so fat, when she ran away, they had to use all four sides of the milk carton.
Yo mama's so fat, when she gets in an elevator, it HAS to go down.
Yo mama's so fat, when she takes a shower, her feet don't get wet.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't wear Dazzey Dukes. She has to wear Boss Hoggs.
Did you hear about the Irish homosexuals?
Michael FitzPatrick and Patrick FitzMichael.
What do nerds use for birth control?
Their personalities.
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