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Author Topic: Share Poems Lyrics and Songs you wrote here.  (Read 246570 times)
mr. moustache
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« Reply #400 on: January 16, 2006, 10:19:29 PM »

thanks Smiley I changed the last line from "who sleep" to "at rest" by the time I passed it in, I know it makes no difference but ya, i did
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journey
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« Reply #401 on: January 17, 2006, 11:26:13 PM »

thanks Smiley I changed the last line from "who sleep" to "at rest" by the time I passed it in, I know it makes no difference but ya, i did

It's a subtle change, but "at rest" is probably more suitable for the subject. Either one is good though.

Look forward to reading some more of your work.
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Goldie
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« Reply #402 on: February 03, 2006, 06:25:52 AM »

Here's one of mine....

Fix of you


It all started so innocent.
But those days came and went.
A little dose here and a little there.
Just enough to take away all my cares.
Just one more became my favorite theme.
Every night fogged over like a dream.
I didn?t care if I lived or died.
All I needed was to be fit to be tied.
Sometimes its for pleasure.
Sometimes for pain.
Either way I don?t care as long as I can do it again.
Sometimes its for love.
Sometimes for money.
Either way I don?t care as long as I?ve got you, honey.
Its so good to release the joy.
I?ve now become its toy.
I don?t give a shit what I do.
You don?t know the hell I?m going through.
All I want is to feel the rage deep inside of me.
To get higher than the mountains and crash below the sea.
Hopefully I will live long enough to tell.
Tell you of this living hell.
Sometimes its for death.
Sometimes for birth.
Either way I don?t care as long as I?m on this Earth.
Sometimes its for me.
Sometimes for you.
Either way I don?t care as long as I see it through.
Sometimes its for pleasure.
Sometimes for pain.
Either way I don?t care as long as I can do it again and again.
Sometimes its for love.
Sometimes for money.
Either way I don?t care as long as I?ve got you in me honey.
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Goldie
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« Reply #403 on: February 08, 2006, 05:56:48 AM »

nobody?? Roll Eyes
did I kill this thread? Shocked

I think I've killed it.? Cry
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journey
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« Reply #404 on: February 08, 2006, 04:30:54 PM »

I like your poem, Goldie. It's cool.  beer
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MR W,AXL ROSE
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« Reply #405 on: February 09, 2006, 12:41:07 AM »

i know a guy from malibu
hes gotta a goatie n cornrows
hes a fair haired kind of bloke
who wears bling from head to toes

if theres one guy left in rock
who can save the day
id put my money on him
coz hez gonna blow all rap away

he has this mystic album
hidden up his sleeve
itll make 50 cent look bad
and beggin on his knees

this guy is gonna put
the rock back in roll
hes gonna save the day
and score the winning goal

by the way his name
is mr axl rose
so dont forget that guys
coz hes gonna save our souls
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╠╗║║║║╠╗║ ║║║ ║╚╣║╠╗║═╬╗║
╚═╩═╩╩╩═╝ ╚╩╝ ╚╩╩═╩═╩═╩═╝
Markus Asraelius
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« Reply #406 on: February 15, 2006, 07:58:25 PM »

Will someone please let me know their opinion on this song, I've been working on it for a little while now.
It's called: The Banshee.

Verse 1
Little, petite blonde sitting on the couch
fixing up her hair to make it look nice.
Sneeking closer to your crotch
just so I can try to get my slice.

In my fantasies...
My hand moves up your skirt,
and I rub those moist panties.
My hands move inside your shirt
as my tongue teases your p*&%$

And you would say:
"Ah!
Oh Marky!"

Chorus:
But, the man sitting down next to you
always destroys my fantasies.
I can't stand the feeling I get
whenever he's around you.
Maybe, someday you will be mine
and I can touch you all over.
But right now, I have to hide from the banshee.

Verse 2
I love to watch you when you cook dinner
and love to dream of you on top of me.
You know that I play like a winner
so why don't you bring that over to me?

In my fantasies...
My hand moves up your skirt,
and I rub those moist panties.
My hands move inside your shirt
as my tongue teases your p*&^(.

And you would say:
"Ah!
Oh Marky!"

Chorus (#2):
But the man who's your husband
always destroys my fantasies.
I can't stand the feeling I get
whenever he puts his arms around you
Maybe, someday you will be mine
and I can touch you all over.
But right now, I have to fight the banshee.

Bridge
I see the way you look at me
and I know for a fact
that you want my body.
You try to look the other way
whenever I get close
but you know that I know...

how much you want me.

Chorus #3
But, the man always next to you
always destroys my fantasies.
I can't stand the feeling I get
whenever he gives me that 'look.'
Maybe someday you will be mine
and he won't even be in this picture.
But for now, I have to run...
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BluesGNR
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« Reply #407 on: February 22, 2006, 02:27:35 AM »

"Under The Ashes" (Written Sept. 11, 2001) Copyright 2002

Killin' with no mercy
I'm waiting for angels to cry
I can't stop you from leaving me tomorrow
No matter how hard I try
Pain and suffering seems like a blessing
To the hell you put me through
And hell is a lie only I'd understand
Because I wouldn't be hurt by you

Under the ashes, is all the pain I hide
Noone seems to care how I feel inside
All I feel anymore is the shit you put me through
I wish I would have never met you

Sometimes I feel so alone
Wanting nothing but to die
Some nights I feel you there
Your shadow by my side
Never in all these years have I had a dream
Somehow I feel I'm losing everything

Under the ashes, is all the pain I hide
Noone seems to care how I feel inside
All I feel anymore is the shit you put me through
I wish I would have never met you

You can see it in my eyes
Somethings gone that wasn't right
Never seen or even dreamed of
Something perfect without a fight
Night has gone, day has come
It's time for me to get out to run
Feel the horror, feed the pain
No matter what I wont take the blame

Under the ashes, is all the pain I hide
Noone seems to care how I feel inside
All I feel anymore is the shit you put me through
I wish I would have never met you

 - - - let me know what you guys think - - -

« Last Edit: September 10, 2007, 10:11:52 PM by BluesGNR » Logged

You'll Find Your Inspiration GN'F'nR

2002: 12.6&8
2006: 5.12&14&15&17 11.5&10&13&24
2011: 11.15 12.10
2012: 2.19&24 11.17
2014: 5.13&28&30
2016: 4.1&8&9 6.23 7.1&3. 8.9&12
Mal Brossard
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« Reply #408 on: February 22, 2006, 11:53:07 AM »

The lead guitarist of my former band wrote a poem that with a little tweaking and piano experimentation, I transformed into this song.  He has family in New Orleans who were affected by Hurrican Katrina, and he wrote this in early September just after everything hit.  Additionally, after we recorded it, we sent a copy to his family down there, who passed it on to none other than rock n' roll legend Fats Domino, who lived in the hotel they were living in.

If you want to hear it let me know in a PM or wherever.  I'll see what I can do.  We have a regular version and a live version, both slightly different.

"Rise Again," Copyright CC40, 2005
Lyrics: Capone/Pelto/O'Reilly
Music: Pelto/Mullen/Capone

August 30th I got the call
The Crescent City had taken the fall
As the water rose
Our people froze
Will they be saved
Who will be blamed
Everyone said they'd die over color
But let's forget about class and race
The people of the South will rise again
Through the heat, the water, and the haze
The man won't help
They left them all alone
As they wonder if they'll ever see their homes
These people are yours
These people are mine
It's the day the sun refused to shine

We'll rise again
We'll rise again
Once again we'll see the saints march in
Our brothers, our sisters, our parents and friends
Tomorrow the sun will shine again

The storm is gone and we will rise again
Together we will reach for the skies
For the lives taken
From the levees breakin'
Reach out your hand
Help your fellow man
To feed the elderly
Or a crying baby
To answer the cries
Of why can't they save me
I saw them make it about black and white
But side by side the refugees unite
You can say they should have left with what they see
As you watch from the comfort of your color TV
Maybe some day again it will be fine
It's the day the sun refused to shine

If you never saw the bayou bay
You'll never know what was lost that day
The music, the people
All are gone
No one knows what'll happen to Mardi Gras
Some call it corrupt
Some call it a slum
For me it's just my second home
The smiles are gone
The trumpets go mute
Good times are over as the people loot
We'll rise again
We'll rise again
Once again we'll see the saints march in
Our brothers, our sisters, our parents and friends
Tomorrow the sun will shine again

"Studio" Version
Lead Vocals: Warren O'Reilly
Lead Electric Guitar: James Capone
Rhythm Electric guitar: James Capone
Lead Acoustic Guitar: James Capone
Slide Acoustic Guitar: James Capone
Rhythm Acoustic Guitar: Drew Pelto
Bass: Sean Mullen
Drums: Drew Pelto
Piano: Sean Mullen
Keyboard Orchestra: Sean Mullen

Live Version
Lead Vocals: Warren O'Reilly
Guitar: James Capone
Keyboards: Sean Mullen
Drums: Drew Pelto
Live Backing Vocals: James Capone, Drew Pelto
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Mal Brossard
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« Reply #409 on: March 12, 2006, 05:14:31 PM »

And once again the amazingness of CC40 brings awed silence to the readers of our lyrics.  Yeah, we so rock.

But seriously folks, I uploaded both versions of the song to our website.  Check them out!

BASEMENT RECORDING: http://www.cc40.com/songs/RiseAgain.mp3

LIVE RECORDING: http://www.cc40.com/songs/RiseAgainLive.mp3

And please, feel free to give me your thoughts on it.  Other than that the basement recording is an overproduced mess recorded on low-quality equipment.  I already knew that. Grin
« Last Edit: March 12, 2006, 05:25:31 PM by Duffman23235 » Logged

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BluesGNR
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« Reply #410 on: March 13, 2006, 11:26:26 PM »

And once again the amazingness of CC40 brings awed silence to the readers of our lyrics.? Yeah, we so rock.

But seriously folks, I uploaded both versions of the song to our website.? Check them out!

BASEMENT RECORDING: http://www.cc40.com/songs/RiseAgain.mp3

LIVE RECORDING: http://www.cc40.com/songs/RiseAgainLive.mp3

And please, feel free to give me your thoughts on it.? Other than that the basement recording is an overproduced mess recorded on low-quality equipment.? I already knew that. Grin

Too much of a story..but maybe thats what you're going for.
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You'll Find Your Inspiration GN'F'nR

2002: 12.6&8
2006: 5.12&14&15&17 11.5&10&13&24
2011: 11.15 12.10
2012: 2.19&24 11.17
2014: 5.13&28&30
2016: 4.1&8&9 6.23 7.1&3. 8.9&12
Mal Brossard
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« Reply #411 on: March 14, 2006, 11:07:19 AM »

Yeah, it is a tad overdone in terms of being too story-like.  Capone said he wanted this to be our "November
Rain" or "Estranged" or whatever.  Like I said, it was basically sort of a rambling poem that just got edited down and cleaned up into this.
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Sin Cut
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« Reply #412 on: March 14, 2006, 03:05:58 PM »

I've really haven't had any lyrics come to mind lately, this one the first in a long time.
Feedback is greatly appriciated.



I know there's an enemy with friends just waiting me to screw
I've tried to let it be, but it gets harder to ignore
when in the meantime he's crying to my bitch
'cuz 'cos of me he was ditched

I guess I tried to compromise
But I can't get rid of the circus
by shaking hands with a clown
No, I can't get rid of the circus
by shaking hands with a clown
I could kick his ass outta town
But it doesn't bother me 'cos of what it began


Baby, you fuel my fire, when I got that one desire
And all innocence is harder when you're on your knees
I guess this is the closest thing to a fairytale I'll ever see
Yeah, this is the closest thing to a fairytale I've ever seen

[outro]

Life made scars on everyone
And sometimes I can't handle mine
But I find my piece of paradise when you smile
I know how cliche it sounds
But just compare it to a fight with a clown
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journey
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« Reply #413 on: March 14, 2006, 03:29:52 PM »

Life made scars on everyone
And sometimes I can't handle mine
But I find my piece of paradise when you smile
I know how cliche it sounds
But just compare it to a fight with a clown[/i]

I really like that verse. It's beautiful.

Great work.  beer
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badapple81
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« Reply #414 on: March 15, 2006, 06:47:41 AM »

Life made scars on everyone
And sometimes I can't handle mine
But I find my piece of paradise when you smile
I know how cliche it sounds
But just compare it to a fight with a clown[/i]

I really like that verse. It's beautiful.

Great work.? beer

I agree Journey.

I just think you have a lot of potential but beautiful verses like that don't necessarily match with:

when in the meantime he's crying to my bitch
'cuz 'cos of me he was ditched


It's kinda like putting a verse from Silkworms in the middle of November Rain even they are both kinda about pain.. if that makes sense.

But keep up the work dude.. maybe I'm wrong.. just let it come out naturally and the emotions flow!
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Sin Cut
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« Reply #415 on: March 15, 2006, 06:53:36 AM »

Thanks for the feedback Journey and GDU.

GDU
What about rocket queen?

But I admit, the song's kinda loose and I'm still trying to work on it  Smiley
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badapple81
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« Reply #416 on: March 15, 2006, 07:09:24 AM »

I was thinking about Rocket Queen too.. perfect example.. and Better (with the last verse).
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Queen of Everything
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« Reply #417 on: March 16, 2006, 07:17:41 AM »

I've really haven't had any lyrics come to mind lately, this one the first in a long time.
Feedback is greatly appriciated.



I know there's an enemy with friends just waiting me to screw
I've tried to let it be, but it gets harder to ignore
when in the meantime he's crying to my bitch
'cuz 'cos of me he was ditched

I guess I tried to compromise
But I can't get rid of the circus
by shaking hands with a clown
No, I can't get rid of the circus
by shaking hands with a clown
I could kick his ass outta town
But it doesn't bother me 'cos of what it began


Baby, you fuel my fire, when I got that one desire
And all innocence is harder when you're on your knees
I guess this is the closest thing to a fairytale I'll ever see
Yeah, this is the closest thing to a fairytale I've ever seen

[outro]

Life made scars on everyone
And sometimes I can't handle mine
But I find my piece of paradise when you smile
I know how cliche it sounds
But just compare it to a fight with a clown


Yay!  Nice work!!!  Thumbs up here
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Formerly "Drama_qween"... but still as cool. Smiley
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journey
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« Reply #418 on: March 20, 2006, 08:09:30 PM »

"Somewhere in the Middle of Nowhere"

Elusive
Aloof
Mysterious treasure
A map
Leading to nowhere

Blood in your veins
Tears describing your pain
Elusive
Aloof
Mysterious treasure
A map
Leading to nowhere

A deep thought escapes
Drowns in the abyss of thoughts
Elusive
Aloof
Mysterious treasure
A map
Leading to nowhere

Walking slowly in a crowd
A sea of eyes that do not see
Elusive
Aloof
Mysterious treasure
A map
Leading to nowhere

The soul was stolen by the greedy pirate
On a ship it sailed away
It's now buried beneath the pearls of every oyster
Mysterious treasure
A map leading to nowhere
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Aava
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« Reply #419 on: March 20, 2006, 08:13:15 PM »

Very good Journey. I like it and you know it!  Wink


Here?s one of mine:


"What A Life"

What on earth is polka dots
Does it really supposed to feel good
Or is it just my head and mind twisted
You can?t tell, can you?

I can?t say about those polka dots
If they are always red like
You don?t care about the colour
You just said how cute I sounded

If you close your scummy eyes
Do you see any of it
Yeah, you were actually right
Colour?s the least thing to care about

Imagination, what?s it got to do with anything
You laughted, what a life
See, I might be playing with your emotions,
but just a bit..
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