Is this wrong (sleeping with your ex)

[anythinggoes]

i would like an outsiders view on this 8 weeks ago me and my partner of 10 years split up she decided we had grown apart which i suppose we had weve got a 5 year old daughter and lived together for 7 years. Anyhow i live with my parents for now and although there has been some comunication between me and my ex is hasnt been a lot. I am looking after my daughter and she feel and hit her head on the floor she is fine she had a little cry but nothing serious, i called my ex so she would come check herself that she was ok which she did and and 2 hours later my daughter went to bed. My parents had gone out so we sat and chatted in the living room for a couple of hours but chatting turned to cuddling, cuddling turned to foreplay and the enevitable happened all along we was saying it doesnt change anything which it hasnt and now she has gone im alone again and i am questioning whether i have done the wrong thing or did it mean something. We are both still single as well. Your thoughts may be interesting

[Bill 213]

Well you guys have a history (a long one) and a daughter....so maybe it's a good thing if you two try to work things out?  It's like this, if you guys stayed together that long, there was obviously something between the two of you.  Maybe you just needed a long break from each other to realize that and sort of get a second start.  My advice would be if you really love her, try slowly to reconcile and repair the mended aspects of growing apart.  Find new things that you can share.  Second chances are rare, so if you feel it's worth it, try try again.

[Jessica]

If the magic's still there, why do you question it ?

Just enjoy, you're lucky in a way, as you said, you are both single.

[Natasha23]

First I think you have to examine WHY you two really broke up.  I know you said you two drifted apart, but there was a reason why you drifted apart.  Then you need to ask yourself if you really want to get back together with her, or are you afraid to be alone.  Then find out how she feels about getting back together with you, since you three are a family and will be always be connected through your daughter.
Hooking up with the ex happens all the time.  I wouldn't stress out about if it was wrong or not, but just be careful that your child doesn't end up with false hope about her mommy and daddy getting back together. 
Something is going to be different with you two... if not, you wouldn't have to both insist it doesn't mean/change anything.  And if it meant something to you, that's how you feel and there's nothing wrong with that.  On the other hand, if it didn't mean anything for her and she was just scratching an itch, there's nothing wrong with that either, because that's how SHE feels (if she feels that way). 
It sounds like you want to talk to her about it... you should.  Communication is never a bad thing.
Good luck.

[2NaFish]

if you get back together is it just gonna play out the same way?

Anyway, its not us you should be asking these questions....

[fieldsy]

Ex's are there to have one night stands with.  Its like the law.

[nycangel]

it really depends on the situation, each individual situation is different, i really wish i could tell you what i think but i dont know that much.
from what i do know i think its good that there are some feelings still there especially because you guys have a daughter, but you should talk to her about it since you guys are the ones going through it.

[Tomorrows]

As Flanders would say, thats dilly of a pickle. Happened all the time when my girlfriend and I were on a break and were back together now 

[godiva]

Call me a hopeless romantic, but sometimes you need some time apart to appreciate what you had. As I read your post, it seems to me as if it was HER decision for you guys to break up and you agreed that the two of you had grown apart. Maybe a bit of time away from each other roused her appetite? The two of you have a history together AND a daughter and you're comfortable with each other. It could be just sex of course, but I hope it means the two of you can work this out. Sometimes after a few years, the romance in the relationship dies, especially when things get hectic with kids and jobs etc. Then, a bit of time apart as the two of you had the past few weeks, can bring back that spark.

I think you need to take some time to think about what YOU want. Would you like the two of you to get back together again? Come on, ask her out on a date, a nice romantic dinner, talk about anything and nothing in particular, have a few drinks, get your ass on that dancefloor, serenade her in front of hundreds of other people.....

If you think the situation is better the way it is now, with the two of you apart, just ignore this ever happened.

Good luck!

[Jessica]

i it just me or is sex a great way to re-open communication ?

It's like after a row, you cuddle up and talk???

[anythinggoes]

i it just me or is sex a great way to re-open communication ?

It's like after a row, you cuddle up and talk???

didnt work that way with me we talked we cuddled we kissed etc then she left

i think it all was one step out of many to come to us sorting out our differences

[Jessica]

yeah, my best memories are usually row first and then...well..better not think about it, i'd get horny..

[R4tfink]

Why does the best sex always come after a row?

Hmmm...hopefully thats my naivity shining through. Hell im 23 but it always seemed that in past relationships, the "after the argument" sex was awesome.

I hope to rectify that very soon. We shall see!

 

[Shirell]

History.  It's got a lot to answer for.  How many of us have slept with an ex because of all the good times we once shared.  I did the same with my ex husband (before I met my man Andy).  I had been together with David for nearly thirteen years and we ended up splitting because of his drug use.  I really loved him.  It broke my heart when we split up.  Our baby was nine months old and I ended up a single mum.  I tried everything to help David get back to life again, I even went to drug counselling to support him but he didnt bother showing up.  I slept with him once after we split because, to be honest, I missed him so much.  It hurt me emotionally so much that I never slept with him again and made myself move on.  It takes time, there's a lot of pain and hurt to go through but, as I eventually discovered life goes on.  Now I've remarried and my husband is everything my ex was not.  He totally worships me and my son, he has made me whole again.  Trust me it' s hard but you have to move on and don't put yourself in the position of getting hurt again.

[ClintroN]

i would like an outsiders view on this 8 weeks ago me and my partner of 10 years split up she decided we had grown apart which i suppose we had weve got a 5 year old daughter and lived together for 7 years. Anyhow i live with my parents for now and although there has been some comunication between me and my ex is hasnt been a lot. I am looking after my daughter and she feel and hit her head on the floor she is fine she had a little cry but nothing serious, i called my ex so she would come check herself that she was ok which she did and and 2 hours later my daughter went to bed. My parents had gone out so we sat and chatted in the living room for a couple of hours but chatting turned to cuddling, cuddling turned to foreplay and the enevitable happened all along we was saying it doesnt change anything which it hasnt and now she has gone im alone again and i am questioning whether i have done the wrong thing or did it mean something. We are both still single as well. Your thoughts may be interesting

up to you if ya wanna keep gettin' ya head fucked

[blaqktiger]

I hope it all works out for you.

[R4tfink]

Why does the best sex always come after a row?

Hmmm...hopefully thats my naivity shining through. Hell im 23 but it always seemed that in past relationships, the "after the argument" sex was awesome.

I hope to rectify that very soon. We shall see!

 

I take this back! 

[johnnythunders24]

no, it's not wrong...sometimes the sex is what made you date someone in the first place...but don't mistake good sex for a new opportunity.

[Sin Cut]

It seems it fucks me up every time, we just broke up and have had more sex than ever.

She came last night from a model shoot and I just couldn't help it.

Afterwards she started crying 'cos we don't talk anymore, prolly due the hurt she gave me.

She also got kicks from me being with another woman, weird

[Shirell]

Blue Cut, you're being a sucker for punishment here.  Move on, it's obvious from your posts how much you're hurting over this girl.  Noone is worth this much pain, seriously.  Make a go of it with your new girl.  LOL