The activity of your sexlife.

[Sin Cut]

You mentioned that you recently started to live together, right?  I think the problem you are having is a rather common one for couples who are living together or married.  The fact is, you are probably irritating each other.  Its normal, everyone does those little things that their partner can't stand.  The difference is that men can seperate that stuff from sex, and women have a more difficult time with that.  If a woman gets into bed after you have left your shoes in the living room, didn't clear your dinner dishes, and left the toilet seat up for the 800th time, she's not going to be feeling affectionate and she's not going to want to have sex.  Men can get just as irritated, but when its time for sex, that stuff goes right out of their heads.

The solution?  Well you won't stop being annoying.  Again, its not personal, we are all irritating in some way.  You would be better off just making a point to be nice and affectionate in the hours before you go to bed.  Compliment her, help her out with some stuff, etc.  Don't do anything that you know is a major pet peeve of hers. 

Chances are you won't go back to the way it was when you first started dating, but you can improve it. 

I don't know, she works the weekends and the weeks she at least two days in evening shift so really we ain't seeing eachother enough to get on our nerves.

Basicly one thing what I don't like about our relationship is the fact that we're seeing each other so little.

Actually I think this is something serious, she's been crying the second night in the row and when I ask what's the matter she can't really tell. Her moods are just shifting so fast, today she was like herself and now she's this other girl again.

Today is what "Life got no point, kinda like my life"-night.

[journey]

I've wondered why is it that girls seldom want to get laid as often as men?

I think that's a myth. It really just depends on the person.

Sometimes a person will have other things on his/her mind that distracts them from focusing on the current situation. It's a mental issue. There may be an underlying cause to what's happening.

Then again, there are some people who don't care about sex as much as others.

I think Sterling made a good point also.

[godiva]

You mentioned that you recently started to live together, right?  I think the problem you are having is a rather common one for couples who are living together or married.  The fact is, you are probably irritating each other.  Its normal, everyone does those little things that their partner can't stand.  The difference is that men can seperate that stuff from sex, and women have a more difficult time with that.  If a woman gets into bed after you have left your shoes in the living room, didn't clear your dinner dishes, and left the toilet seat up for the 800th time, she's not going to be feeling affectionate and she's not going to want to have sex.  Men can get just as irritated, but when its time for sex, that stuff goes right out of their heads.

The solution?  Well you won't stop being annoying.  Again, its not personal, we are all irritating in some way.  You would be better off just making a point to be nice and affectionate in the hours before you go to bed.  Compliment her, help her out with some stuff, etc.  Don't do anything that you know is a major pet peeve of hers. 

Chances are you won't go back to the way it was when you first started dating, but you can improve it. 

I don't know, she works the weekends and the weeks she at least two days in evening shift so really we ain't seeing eachother enough to get on our nerves.

Basicly one thing what I don't like about our relationship is the fact that we're seeing each other so little.

Actually I think this is something serious, she's been crying the second night in the row and when I ask what's the matter she can't really tell. Her moods are just shifting so fast, today she was like herself and now she's this other girl again.

Today is what "Life got no point, kinda like my life"-night.

Pregnant?

Sorry, sorry, just kidding. Man, this girl is depressed. Depressed people have no sex drive. Problem is that depression doesn't need a reason, you just feel that way, so the solution is not that easy. If she could tell you what's wrong, you can start working on it. If she just 'feels that way', and doesn't know why, there is very little you can do besides hugging her, right?

I know I made a joke earlier about asking her instead of us, but I think that?s the only real solution here. None of us can look inside her head and tell you how she feels or why she is feeling that way. Only she can. Try and find a way to communicate with her.

Try and talk to her at a time when she is feeling all right. Start by telling her how much she means to you and that you are concerned about her and the relationship you have with her. Ask her to please listen to your concerns and emphasize that your concern is the only reason for you to have this talk with her. Tell her you don?t want to hurt her in any way, but this is something that?s been bothering you very much. Throw in some juicy stuff, we girls like that. Tips: want to grow old with you, wake up with a smile every day when you lay next to me, my life started when I met you blah blah blah (just pull a straight face, she will totally fall for it). Then hopefully she will let you in and share her emotions with you and hopefully you can work it out.

putting down my shrink hat now...... good luck!

[godiva]

I've wondered why is it that girls seldom want to get laid as often as men?

I think that's a myth. It really just depends on the person.

Sometimes a person will have other things on his/her mind that distracts them from focusing on the current situation. It's a mental issue. There may be an underlying cause to what's happening.

Then again, there are some people who don't care about sex as much as others.

I think Sterling made a good point also.

Remember, we girls can have multiple orgasms. So once for you, is 8 times for us 

[D]

Does masturbating count as a sexlife?


I think the whole "it wears off" is bullshit.


I think it is a mental thing.

Friends and TV whatever teaches u that relationships start out great and then romantically fizzle and its become NORMAL to believe that this how it has to be.

I say that is bullshit.

Why cant u be as passionate and romantic and IN to someone in the 10th year as u were the 1st month.

I believe u have to keep things alive and both partners need to fight against it.

A relationship can be as great,happy and as passionate as the partners want it to be.

There isnt something encoded in our DNA that makes us less passionate over time.

[godiva]

Does masturbating count as a sexlife?

only if you do it right 

[Sterlingdog]

I don't know, she works the weekends and the weeks she at least two days in evening shift so really we ain't seeing eachother enough to get on our nerves.

Basicly one thing what I don't like about our relationship is the fact that we're seeing each other so little.

Actually I think this is something serious, she's been crying the second night in the row and when I ask what's the matter she can't really tell. Her moods are just shifting so fast, today she was like herself and now she's this other girl again.

Today is what "Life got no point, kinda like my life"-night.

After reading this, I have to completely change my opinion.  This is much more serious than sex.  Clearly she's got something on her mind, and she may not want to share it with you.  But if there isn't improvement quickly (and I mean within a week or so) you should suggest that if she isn't comfortable talking to you, that she talk to someone about what she's feeling.  And you really need to be ok with the fact that you might not be her choice of who to talk to. 

I don't know how old you guys are, but I'm guessing early to mid 20's?  That can be a rough time because you start to feel like you have to make life decisions, and maybe feeling like you aren't ready.   In any case, it sounds like she's trying to get through some issues and the best thing you can do is be supportive.  Don't pressure her over the sex thing; I'm sure the last thing she needs is to feel like she's disappointing you.

[Kujo]

Does masturbating count as a sexlife?

This from the guy who had unprotected phone sex and caught hearing-aids.


Let me tie this in with something that got brought up in the "Brokeback/Sexuality" thread. It was mentioned in that thread that animals have homosexual relationships, so it should/could be defined as a "natural" act. Now I agree with this but thats not the point here.

Do you see any animal other than the human species that chooses one mate, and stays with that mate their entire lives? 

[Sterlingdog]

Does masturbating count as a sexlife?

This from the guy who had unprotected phone sex and caught hearing-aids.


Let me tie this in with something that got brought up in the "Brokeback/Sexuality" thread. It was mentioned in that thread that animals have homosexual relationships, so it should/could be defined as a "natural" act. Now I agree with this but thats not the point here.

Do you see any animal other than the human species that chooses one mate, and stays with that mate their entire lives? 

Aren't there quite a few?  I don't know where to look that up.  But I'm positive there are certain birds that do..I only know stuff about birds.

[SLCPUNK]

Homosexual animals:

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2004/07/0722_040722_gayanimal.html

Animal mates for life:

http://www.azcentral.com/home/columns/articles/0212petdoc0212.html

[Kujo]

Thanks for the links.

It even mentions though that with some of the "Mate for Life" cases the male still is not monogamaus.

[SLCPUNK]

Thanks for the links.

It even mentions though that with some of the "Mate for Life" cases the male still is not monogamaus.

They are good reads.

To be honest, I think monogamy itself is not natural.

[Sterlingdog]

Thanks for the links.

It even mentions though that with some of the "Mate for Life" cases the male still is not monogamaus.

I was just reading some stuff about birds and it said even in those that mate for life, both partners have sex with others.

[MCT]

To be honest, I think monogamy itself is not natural.

Well there's certainly a strong biological case to made, yeah. But societal memes, and more importantly, individual leanings, could suggest otherwise. In fact, individual leanings (of the monogamous sort), would suggest otherwise.

But ecumenically speaking, you could easily argue both sides of that coin you just tossed in. Especially since we're now, as a species, pushing past foundational biology; if only just a little.

Me personally? Whatever I'm in the mood for...

Anyway...interesting thought is all...

[BLS-Pride]

If you got the right person then it will always be there.

10 months into my relationship and still hot and heavy for each other.

[anythinggoes]

If you got the right person then it will always be there.

10 months into my relationship and still hot and heavy for each other.

hope it works out for you mine was like that at 10 months and now 125 months later it has just finished ended just like that house mortgage a kid cars no one else involved either

[Sterlingdog]

hope it works out for you mine was like that at 10 months and now 125 months later it has just finished ended just like that house mortgage a kid cars no one else involved either

Mind if I ask what went wrong?  And is there really no saving it?  10 years is a long time to invest in a relationship to have it end. 

[anythinggoes]

She was 15 when we got together 19 when we got a house and 20 when we had baby. She now wants all the things she missed out on. We have very little in common we dont have a sex life she lost her sex drive 8 months ago. As a result we hardly talk no passion i work over 60 hours a week and she goes out most evenings leavin me with daughter and general housework.   

[Back Off Bitch]

That's sad dude  Sorry...

[D]

If you got the right person then it will always be there.

10 months into my relationship and still hot and heavy for each other.

Agree 100 percent

22 months and counting and we are as passionate as we were in month 2.