Problems with mixed dating

[2NaFish]

you know there is good and bad in all... I am far from a racist where I live it's very melting pot so you go with the flow... I have one daughter and another kid on the way so for me I would prefer if she dated another white guy.. I know that must sound wrong but I have lived in brooklyn nyc my entire life and have seen the way it is around here... I had went to a mostly black HS and hung around with a lot of black people.. A good deal of them do not treat the females in their life very good.. Now that doesn't mean everyone, but it;'s enough to have a concern when it's your flesh n blood.. You watch rap videos see violence with black men adn a lot of it happens right were I live..it's not just some random thing that tons of rap stars come from by me.. Many of them are really teh way they portray themselves on tv..

Now this doesn't mean if my daughter brought home a black man I would throw him out, it's just if I had to chose I rather she date a white guy.. it's no different the other way around when the girl is white to the black parents.. Later in life the mixed kids get shit too..
I know it comes down to who she loves, but I also have to look out for her safety.. it's not some coincidence that each bad neighborhood in nyc is not white.. Must depend where you live..

Sorry, dude... but by saying you prefer she date a white guy over a black guy means that skin color means something to you, and that's a racist comment. At least be honest with yourself.

And it doesn't take pale skin to treat a woman with respect. How a man chooses to treat a woman has absolutely nothing to do with the color of their skin, it has to do with what they've got inside, and on the inside, we are all the same color.

I think mike is saying he doesnt mind the colour of skin, it is the culture and society that often goes along with with that skin colour that means he is protective of his children's safety.

I don't agree with what he's saying totally, but it's an honest statement that is not racially motivated. It's motivated by culture.

Or maybe he's not. Maybe he just hates ni**ers.

[Tied-Up]

you know there is good and bad in all... I am far from a racist where I live it's very melting pot so you go with the flow... I have one daughter and another kid on the way so for me I would prefer if she dated another white guy.. I know that must sound wrong but I have lived in brooklyn nyc my entire life and have seen the way it is around here... I had went to a mostly black HS and hung around with a lot of black people.. A good deal of them do not treat the females in their life very good.. Now that doesn't mean everyone, but it;'s enough to have a concern when it's your flesh n blood.. You watch rap videos see violence with black men adn a lot of it happens right were I live..it's not just some random thing that tons of rap stars come from by me.. Many of them are really teh way they portray themselves on tv..

Now this doesn't mean if my daughter brought home a black man I would throw him out, it's just if I had to chose I rather she date a white guy.. it's no different the other way around when the girl is white to the black parents.. Later in life the mixed kids get shit too..
I know it comes down to who she loves, but I also have to look out for her safety.. it's not some coincidence that each bad neighborhood in nyc is not white.. Must depend where you live..

Sorry, dude... but by saying you prefer she date a white guy over a black guy means that skin color means something to you, and that's a racist comment. At least be honest with yourself.

And it doesn't take pale skin to treat a woman with respect. How a man chooses to treat a woman has absolutely nothing to do with the color of their skin, it has to do with what they've got inside, and on the inside, we are all the same color.

I think mike is saying he doesnt mind the colour of skin, it is the culture and society that often goes along with with that skin colour that means he is protective of his children's safety.

I don't agree with what he's saying totally, but it's an honest statement that is not racially motivated. It's motivated by culture.

Or maybe he's not. Maybe he just hates ni**ers.

My point is... is that he is stereotyping because of a race -- you can say it's for cultural differences, or the way society is, or whatever, but it's still a comment based on the color of skin, because until you actually get to know a person, you don't know what kind of upbringing they've had, and hense, you have no idea what kind of differences actually exist.? You can take two people who were born and raised in Irvine, CA, one black and one white, and two people who were born and raised in Compton, CA, one black and one white... and just because the two white guys have the same color skin, doesn't mean that they are going to behave toward a woman similarly.? Same with the two black guys.

If you profile a person's personality and the way they will treat another person based upon the color of their skin and not on the person within, this is a racially motivated thought process.? No matter how much you want to sugar coat it... you're still being racist.

[2NaFish]

Thanks for that. I do know what racism is.

The difference between a racist and mike is that a racist wouldn't find out what sort of person the black guy was. They'd just stop it completely. Mike just said he'd prefer it if she chose a white guy. If the guy did turn out to be a dick to women then i'm sure mike would do something about it. And if a white guy was a dick to his daughter i'm sure mike would intervene too. But if the guy was good to his daughter, it appears from his past that he'd get along fine with the guy.

[Tied-Up]

Thanks for that. I do know what racism is.

The difference between a racist and mike is that a racist wouldn't find out what sort of person the black guy was. They'd just stop it completely. Mike just said he'd prefer it if she chose a white guy. If the guy did turn out to be a dick to women then i'm sure mike would do something about it. And if a white guy was a dick to his daughter i'm sure mike would intervene too. But if the guy was good to his daughter, it appears from his past that he'd get along fine with the guy.

Thanks for that... I do know the difference.   

My point is that it was still a racist comment.  You can sugar coat it all you want and say it's merely a preference, but, when you make a preference based upon skin color, it's a racially motivated preference. 

Now, do I think Mike is a racist?  No.  I think his comment was a racist comment, but I don't think he intended it to be interpreted that way.   I mean, I would rather my daughter date a rich man rather than a poor one, but if she brings home a poor one, I'm not going to throw him out.  That doesn't make my comment any less of a profiling statement.

[Sin Cut]

Best advice u will hear


If u have to change and be something u are not to get a girl to like u


FUCK THE GIRL!

Yeah, isn't that the point?

[Acquiesce]

Tied-Up, I disagree with you that Mike's comment was racist. Many people, regardless of their race, would prefer their loved ones to date someone from their own race. Does that necessarily make them racist? I don't think it does because I think most people want prefer what is most familiar to them and what attracts them the most. Do you also feel its racist when a white person says they only prefer to date black people? I mean, they are just choosing people based on the color of their skin, aren't they? Somehow I doubt you would because you certainly didn't mention it when you responded to the original topic. I think people are too quick to shout racist when a white person says something that isn't 100% positive to minorities.

[Lisa]

you love who you love...regardless of gender or colour..the rest is shit...love is colourblind

[Tied-Up]

Tied-Up, I disagree with you that Mike's comment was racist. Many people, regardless of their race, would prefer their loved ones to date someone from their own race. Does that necessarily make them racist? I don't think it does because I think most people want prefer what is most familiar to them and what attracts them the most. Do you also feel its racist when a white person says they only prefer to date black people? I mean, they are just choosing people based on the color of their skin, aren't they? Somehow I doubt you would because you certainly didn't mention it when you responded to the original topic. I think people are too quick to shout racist when a white person says something that isn't 100% positive to minorities.

Well Acquiesce: ?You would be wrong. ?I think that judging based only upon race is a racist choice, regardless of who is making the choice, and what race is being chosen. ?I feel that things should be equal across the board, for all races and genders.

Racism ['rA-"si-z&m] (n): a belief that race is the primary determinant of human traits and capacities

When you say "I prefer to date whites" or "I prefer to date blacks" ?you are making a choice based on skin color, not upon the person inside the skin. ?That's a decision based upon race, hence, it is a racist decision. ?It doesn't mean that person is a hate-harboring racist. ?It means that he/she sees the skin color before they see the person under the skin.

What if an employer said "I prefer to hire whites" or "I prefer to hire blacks"

[SLCPUNK]

There is all different kinds of prejudice boys and girls.

We are all a bit, if we admit it or not.

[Acquiesce]

Tied-Up, I disagree with you that Mike's comment was racist. Many people, regardless of their race, would prefer their loved ones to date someone from their own race. Does that necessarily make them racist? I don't think it does because I think most people want prefer what is most familiar to them and what attracts them the most. Do you also feel its racist when a white person says they only prefer to date black people? I mean, they are just choosing people based on the color of their skin, aren't they? Somehow I doubt you would because you certainly didn't mention it when you responded to the original topic. I think people are too quick to shout racist when a white person says something that isn't 100% positive to minorities.

Well Acquiesce: ?You would be wrong. ?I think that judging based only upon race is a racist choice, regardless of who is making the choice, and what race is being chosen. ?I feel that things should be equal across the board, for all races and genders.

Racism ['rA-"si-z&m] (n): a belief that race is the primary determinant of human traits and capacities

When you say "I prefer to date whites" or "I prefer to date blacks" ?you are making a choice based on skin color, not upon the person inside the skin. ?That's a decision based upon race, hence, it is a racist decision. ?It doesn't mean that person is a hate-harboring racist. ?It means that he/she sees the skin color before they see the person under the skin.

What if an employer said "I prefer to hire whites" or "I prefer to hire blacks"

I'm wrong but yet it took me to point it out to you for you to say it's just as wrong for a white person to say they prefer black people. Right.

I still disagree with you because it may not be so much the skin color as someone may just be naturally attracted to the physical characteristics that are unique to a certain race. I mean I find Hispanic guys to be more attractive than Asian guys, but I certainly don't think less of Asians. So if I say I prefer Hispanic guys that is just like me saying I prefer tall guys.  It may be shallow but not racist. I certainly have my preferences but I never let my preferences get in the way so that I would exclude someone because they don't fall into that category. I don't see what is wrong with that.

I also don't think the original comment was racist because to me it wouldn't be much different if the comment was "I would prefer if she dated a rock fan." It's all about familiarity. Besides, it's not as if he said he would be  totally against her dating black guys. Now that would have been racist. I just think racism is a strong word and people should be careful before they throw it out there.

[MikeB]

All Right, I didn't start no racism rant.What I meant in the very begining was that a relative of mine verbally abused me because of her opinion that I was scared she was right and  I became less-confident  of myself . But then  I descovered this quote ,

If you go out to the sea, remember this, not every fish is going to bite your bait.

[Tied-Up]

Mike ... that's a great quote!

I'm wrong but yet it took me to point it out to you for you to say it's just as wrong for a white person to say they prefer black people. Right.

I still disagree with you because it may not be so much the skin color as someone may just be naturally attracted to the physical characteristics that are unique to a certain race. I mean I find Hispanic guys to be more attractive than Asian guys, but I certainly don't think less of Asians. So if I say I prefer Hispanic guys that is just like me saying I prefer tall guys. It may be shallow but not racist. I certainly have my preferences but I never let my preferences get in the way so that I would exclude someone because they don't fall into that category. I don't see what is wrong with that.

I also don't think the original comment was racist because to me it wouldn't be much different if the comment was "I would prefer if she dated a rock fan." It's all about familiarity. Besides, it's not as if he said he would be totally against her dating black guys. Now that would have been racist. I just think racism is a strong word and people should be careful before they throw it out there.

Acquiesce:? I didn't say it was "just as wrong for white people to say they prefer black people" because... well, I was commenting on this post from mikegiuliana:

you know there is good and bad in all... I am far from a racist where I live it's very melting pot so you go with the flow... I have one daughter and another kid on the way so for me I would prefer if she dated another white guy.. I know that must sound wrong but I have lived in brooklyn nyc my entire life and have seen the way it is around here... I had went to a mostly black HS and hung around with a lot of black people.. A good deal of them do not treat the females in their life very good.. Now that doesn't mean everyone, but it;'s enough to have a concern when it's your flesh n blood.. You watch rap videos see violence with black men adn a lot of it happens right were I live..it's not just some random thing that tons of rap stars come from by me.. Many of them are really teh way they portray themselves on tv..

Now this doesn't mean if my daughter brought home a black man I would throw him out, it's just if I had to chose I rather she date a white guy.. it's no different the other way around when the girl is white to the black parents.. Later in life the mixed kids get shit too..
I know it comes down to who she loves, but I also have to look out for her safety.. it's not some coincidence that each bad neighborhood in nyc is not white.. Must depend where you live..

Since he had said that he would prefer his daughter to date a white man, I commented on that.? If he had said that he would prefer his daughter date a black man, I would have still commented on the racist slant.

in addition, I understand 'attraction' and that skin color/race is a part of appearance upon which we base physical attraction.? However, since that wasn't the issue concerning mikegiuliana's post... I didn't mention it either.?

My main point is basically what SLC has said... we all have our prejudices.? All I was saying is be honest about them.   

[*Izzy*]

I'm prejudice against all races 

  Izzy?

[Queen of Everything]

I'm prejudice against all races?

  Izzy?

Izzy hates all....

Izzy, Why cant you show love?? Why??

I think somone needs a hug!!!! 

[nesquick]

To make it clear to everybody, I'm not one percent of a racist , I have best friends that are black .Anyway but I'm having this fear that white girls are all of a sudden droping white guys for black guys .This all started with my one white female cousin. She hates whites for god knows what but she shoves it down my throat that black guys are better than white guys, same thing with her sister. As a high school student now ( going on senior) I really want a girlfriend desperatley . I'm so fucking shy and insecure . Right now in high school the hip-hop trend is popular , i hate being turned down .One time at a party , this cousin i mentioned ridiculed me for my long hair because being white is not cool in her book , i was really pissed . Does anyone have the same experience?

Stay yourself dude. if people aren't satisfied by who you are, where you come from, the colour of your skin, or your eyes or your religion or whatever, the problem comes rather from them, not from you. 

[*Izzy*]

I'm prejudice against all races?

  Izzy?

Izzy hates all....

Izzy, Why cant you show love?? Why??

I think somone needs a hug!!!!?

I could give up hatred anytime, I just don't want to

  Izzy?

[Sakib]

listen, just old on. I luckil got a gf that liked gn'r. There really is no point in d8ing girls like that. trust me. theyr arrogant assholes that judge people on looks and shit like that rather than personality.

[D]

I think most cultures white,black,whatever want their children to stay within their race.

I know a lot of black people that hate when a black guy dates a white chick as if black women arent good enough for them

there is a huge difference

there are rednecks and white people
there are niggers and black people

I dont want my daughter dating a red neck or a nigger but she can date a white or black guy as long as they treat her right.

now if the guy abuses her in anyway black white or whatever, he is gonna have some serious fuckin problems with me.

[Walk]

All attempts to separate race and culture are doomed to fail. Blacks have their own culture over 400 years after arriving in the New World. Whites have lost much of our culture after late 19th century immigration, notably the Irish and Italians. Potatoes and pizza don't count. At least compared to Europeans, white Americans are very mixed. Our level of culture, of course, is much much lower.

Race and culture are too closely linked to each to take miscegenation lightly. It's not race mixing that people really hate, it's culture mixing (and getting watered down), yet the two are too closely linked to separate.

[ClintroN]

To make it clear to everybody, I'm not one percent of a racist , I have best friends that are black .Anyway but I'm having this fear that white girls are all of a sudden droping white guys for black guys .This all started with my one white female cousin. She hates whites for god knows what but she shoves it down my throat that black guys are better than white guys, same thing with her sister. As a high school student now ( going on senior) I really want a girlfriend desperatley . I'm so fucking shy and insecure . Right now in high school the hip-hop trend is popular , i hate being turned down .One time at a party , this cousin i mentioned ridiculed me for my long hair because being white is not cool in her book , i was really pissed . Does anyone have the same experience?

wtf dude,.....................what are you thinkin'!!!

Dont you know that one day your gonna meet a girl who is into all your shit and will proberly kill you if you cut your hair!

Fuck what your stupid arse cousin says..........she's a fucken trend follower mate, and your not, THATS WHY YOUR COOL DUDE!!

Just 'cause its the cool thing to dress like these FUCKEN PATHETIC cockheads on MTV or whatever and listen to that BULLSHIT, dont let it put you down, my last girlfriend changed because everyone els listend to techno n' all that shit, BUT I FUCKEN DIDNT!!   and it made me realize somethin'............IM FUCKEN REAL, i dont change for trends and the hip shit, i'll still be headbangin' with my long hair and METALLICA shirts for the rest of my life...and laugh at these dumb arse rappers and think....WHAT FUCKHEADS!!!!

FUCK TREND FOLLOWERS
FUCK TODAYS BLACK RAP SHIT (oh i better make it clear before someone shits, i have black freinds too ) old school rap is real, NWA, ICE T-CUBE, the old school shit!! Not like fuckwit SNOOP who does duets with cunts and gold chains n' all that bullshit for the screen!!
FUCK MTV
FUCK SNOOP AND HIS POSSE
FUCK YOUR COUSIN AND HER BELEIFS AND FUCK YOU  (na not you mate )

I've just met a girl too and guess what, SHE'S MORE METAL THEN ME AND HAS PANTERA TATTED UP HER FUCKEN LEG, and one day you'll find someone dude, until then...........sit back n' laugh at all these tough boy pimped up getto wannabes on TV, remember that they are wimps who need to flash there money in your face with there bitches hangin' on there sides.   
Your cousin is a product of 'whats the in thing, oh black people are, i better buy some top 50 singles and be a high roller.

YOUR BETTER THEN THAT, lets see your cousin in afew years when the next trend is out... FUCKEN PATHETIC!!

go get stoned or somethin' in the mean time