HTGTH posters GN'R outrageous story (fun topic)

[Vegar]

That Robin is missing, so he

[Sin Cut]

... figures he should all ready be at Tokyo Dome, and while checkin' out of the hotel he realizes, that Earl is nowhere to be found and his place is taken by D (who's also having a side-career at local porn industry as a fluffer) Axl say's to D that it's time to...

[Izzy]

... figures he should all ready be at Tokyo Dome, and while checkin' out of the hotel he realizes, that Earl is nowhere to be found and his place is taken by D (who's also having a side-career at local porn industry as a fluffer) Axl say's to D that it's time to...

''.....Wake up, time to play!'' And they head off to the gig - though their late its no later than usual and D puts in a great performance on the triangle but in the closing seconds the show collapses into anarchy because.....

[youngerformofaxl]

they realize they are really on an island in the Bermuda Triangle.  So axl decides he has to...

[MCT]

...bend D over the nearest fallen coconut tree and try and extract the flare gun from his large intestine. But all of a sudden...

[Sin Cut]

...a ghost ship appears from nowhere, and on the side it reads "Slc's 24h sheep transporting", and Axl orders D to fill up his "aero-bed", no you can have a cozy bed in only a minute! Axl and D start to head for the ghostship, but...

[Mr Cowbell ?]

Axl realises he's been brain washed into being gay, he then find a loco voodoo shop, and asks the man to put a spell on him turning him straight but instead the man casts a ......

[MCT]

...penis enlargement enchantment on D. Upon seeing his manhood unexpectedly grow to the size of a small python, D decides it's time to play swords with the red-head banshee.  But all of a sudden...

[insupportofaxl]

Axl punches the shit out of D, knocking D to the ground, unconscious.  Axl says, "You are forever fired from MY BAND MOTHER FUCKER".

The impact of D falling to the ground and Axl's right hand blow to D's jaw forces the flare gun out of D's large intestine.  Axl takes off his shirt and wipes off the gun and shoots a flare in the direction of the ghost ship. 

The ghost ship heads for Axl, brings him onto the ship and Axl sees a pirate that resembles Duff.  Axl............

(on a side note......like I emailed to SLC.......wouldn't you laugh if this thread got  mentioned by Axl in a rant?  I can see it now, "some of you mother fuckers have one active imagination.  You know who you are ......sheep shaggin and shit" )

[Doc Emmett Brown]

The ghost ship heads for Axl, brings him onto the ship and Axl sees a pirate that resembles Duff.? Axl............

Axl takes the unconscious D along with him to the ship.  He entices Duff the pirate with a bottle of rum, gin & tonic, whiskey and vodka.  Duff's liver and spleen explode and he is made to walk the plank. 
Axl sets sail for Los Angeles Harbor, San Pedro.  But he faces many dangers on his Odysseusian journey.  First he meets a one-eyed man who tells him...

[insupportofaxl]

He is the half brother of Slash.? Axl looks at him and Axl can't figure out why Slash kept this secret from him and Axl wonders what other secrets his ex band members have kept from him.

Axl is offered to drink with the one eyed?man and together, they toast Slash.

The one eyed man lights up a cigar and asks Axl.............

[MCT]

...if he has ever looked a monkey in the eye. Axl, thinking back on the sight of D and his jungle snake, confesses that yes, he has looked a monkey in the eye; but only once. The One Eyed Man then tells Axl about the time that he himself looked a monkey in the eye, and ended up with only one eye himself.

Meanwhile, awake from his bout with unconsciousness, D can't help but overhear the conversation between Axl and the mysterious One Eyed Man. And thinking that Axl just might get it into his head that D was out to blind him, he jumps up and...

[youngerformofaxl]

introduces his friend that mysteriously goes by the name of The Younger Form of Axl. Axl  dosen't really like this so he decides to...

[Sin Cut]

...to call his good friend Blue Cut, with whom he figures it's time to go to war with Velvet Revolver and start a musical revolution, and so Blue Cut brings his rack of semi-automatic rifles and arrives to on the ship on a huge robot bird (which is painted pink and has yellow dots on it) and...

[RichardNixon]

Axl moons D and D is surprised to see that Axl has three buttocks and so...

[Mattman]

D wakes up from his hallucination.  What a crazy dream!  He immediately decides to lower his daily dosage of LSD.

Back in LA, Axl is still reluctant to release Chinese Democracy.  Facing a midlife crisis, he suddenly decides to reinvent himself.  Axl joins the CIA and becomes a sleeper agent in China, hoping to destroy the Communist Party from within and bring to fruit actual Chinese democracy.  He works his way up to become the right hand man of the Chinese Premier Zhang, and eagerly awaits his chance to be handed the reins to power.

One day, Zhang dies.  Axl is named his successor, and immediately announces his plan to...

[RichardNixon]

dig up Mao and have him rule by his side, there is only one problem...

[Dizzy]

....Mao believes that the centuries he has spent in the grave were a shorter period of time than the wait for Chinese Democracy so he promptly reburies himself, subjecting himself to the inevitable "Fuck you Mao!  You stabbed Axl in the back!" taunts from Axl's disciples at HTGTH.  Meanwhile, Tommy Stinson's take on the whole thing is.....

[insupportofaxl]

"Axl's really just a hair's breadth from being hell bent on finding out why a few pages back in this thread, Jarmo banned him( Axl) from an unofficial site where he is the main focal point."




Upon finding out that HTGTH has banned Axl, Tommy decides to PM Jarmo since Axl can't. 

Jarmo decides to ask Adz to once again reply as Jarmo won't believe anyone from GN'R, ex or hired gun, would really post on his site.

Adz reads Tommy's pm.  It says,

"Jarmo, why did you ban Axl?  Didn't you realize CD is rumored to be out the whole month of November, 2004 and that because I used the terminology 'hair's breadth' means everything?"


Adz, makes this face------------>   and replies to Tommy's pm.................but first, Adz can't get over the fact that Tommy's htgth screen name is really .............

[Mr Cowbell ?]

D.....