HTGTH posters GN'R outrageous story (fun topic)

[insupportofaxl]

out of this world and amazing.....like nothing I've ever heard before".

D is dumbfounded that Axl replied this way because D has been playing guitar way before Slash and says to Axl curtly, "Axl.? Do you know where the fuck you are dude?? You are in the year 2004 and the month of August to be exact.? It's about time you realized that you have found your man to take GN'R to it's highest level possible, as a band that'll live on in the hearts of many and prove once and for all to all the naysayers that you can still have it with me in your band."

Axl is elated and jumps to joy that D said this because ever since RIO cancellation, Axl has been searching for just the right guitarist to make GN'R tick.

Axl says to D, "D, do you want to always get a paycheck for the rest of your life and never lift a finger?"

D says, "sure Axl.? Count me in.? Where do you want me to sign?"

Upon hearing this, Axl calls Merck and has him draw up a contract to have D officially named new lead guitarist for GN'R.?


Axl gives D the contract to look over.? D starts to read through it and gets to page 300 when he sees a clause that may make him reconsider this offer because it states the following:...............................

[RichardNixon]

You must kiss Barbra Bush on the Ass, to which D says...

[badapple81]

.. only if I get to kiss SLC's ass first..

[D]

D of course was only jokin about the SLC part, so after tossin barbara bush's salad D is the new guitarist in gnr and guess who the first person that wants to be D's groupie is?

u got it! gunner down under! D, for his own amusement makes gunnerdownunder do xgame type freestyle shit with his kangaroo, after all this D makes gunner pee in a litter box and after that gunner down under....................

[Mattman]

kills D and puts on one of those Mission: Impossible-style rubber face masks in order to assume D's identity and become guitarist in Guns N' Roses himself.  However, when he goes back to Axl, he notices to his horror that Axl has...

[RichardNixon]

fallen into a pit of lava and has to be turned into Darth Axl. Will this cause another delay in Chinese Democracy or...

[Mattman]

will Axl abandon music once and for all to further his dream of conquering the galaxy?  The only person that can stop Axl is Gunner Down Under.  As Axl's sax player and (pretending to be D) guitar player, Gunner Down Under finds that he has access to the battle plans for Axl's grand scheme: the construction of a Death Album, with the destructive capacity to ruin the hearing of an entire planet.  Torn between his loyalty to Axl and his consicence, Gunner Down Under makes up his mind.  He decides...

[badapple81]

.. that he will forever remain loyal to Axl, I mean if we didnt have the wait of Chinese Democracy.. we would have missed out on such moments as:

- Mattman's thread on Axl's virginity
- the 'do you milk it or shake it' thread

By the way, is anybody concerned about D's apparent worrying interest and fantasies of myself having sexual encounters with kangaroos, and SLC with sheep?   

[Doc Emmett Brown]

The ever-loyal Skippy discovers the awful truth.  Axl actually has an evil twin: W. Botaxl Rose who is the reason behind all the CD delays and is hellbent on conquering the universe.  The real Axl is imprisoned on a remote island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.  Gunner Down Under forms an A-team with Izzy, Fortus, D, SLC and Chris Pittman.  Together they begin the journey to save the real Axl and defeat his evil twin.

[RichardNixon]

But on the Island the real Axl falls in love with a beautiful blonde woman, and on their wedding night, Axl is horrified to learn that he has really married Sammy Hagar. Just then...

[SLCPUNK]

First the recruit two twin Comandos to lead this rescue mission: Danny DeVito and Arnold Schwarzenegger. Turns out Arnold was raised on this same Island and has a plan to get there.......

[RichardNixon]

  Hey, you skipped me

[Mr Cowbell ?]

His plan is to do Bad Acting in money over produced summer blockbusters. When Danny tells Arnold is is actually human and not a robot, Arnold gets sad and they begin to row out on a rowboat.

After Devito gets tired Arnold rows the rest of the way where apon the beach he sees

[RichardNixon]

Axl and Sammy Hagar having sex in red jello...

[badapple81]

Axl and Sammy Hagar having sex in red jello...

This is getting rather scary 

[Izzy]

Axl and Sammy Hagar having sex in red jello...

Or so it seemed from a distance, infact it was Axl and Lionel Ritchie doing a duet of a cover by.....

[SLCPUNK]

Hey, you skipped me

This happens sometimes. Sorry, I didnt' mean to. Our post times are pretty close, but when I posted, I obviously did not see yours (it wasn't showing yet).....

[Mr Cowbell ?]

Axl and Sammy Hagar having sex in red jello...

Or so it seemed from a distance, infact it was Axl and Lionel Ritchie doing a duet of a cover by.....

"We got tonight" by Bob Segar. Axl Looks deep into Lionel's eyes, and Lionel back. Axl informs Lionel that this island is the Jungle. Where Lionel replies "Say you.... Say me" Now Axl is creeped out in ways he can never desribe and wonders to himself why all his sexual dreams have men popping up in them. He suddenly wakes up and realises he has been dreaming and its really still 1993 and....

[Rockin' Rose]

the Guns are suppose to throw a show in Tokyo Dome, Axl realizes they've already two hours late so he leaves the backstage and decides to...

[insupportofaxl]

light up a big fattie to calm himself down as his dreams have crept him out.

Upon lighting up the fattie, Axl realizes once and for all that.............