Hockey players: how would you handle this?

[Mal Brossard]

I'm sure we have a few HTGTH members who play hockey.

So I'm playing in a league sponsored by the junior team I work for. So far, my team (the green team) is 3-0 on the year. This past week, we played against the black team, beating them 8-7.

The black team has this ass playing for them who decides he wants to be Mr. Big Tough Guy. He's hacking everyone, cross-checking anyone who gets within ten feet of the net, wrestling our guys down if they dare respond to his cheap crap. Best of all, the guy could afford to lose about 70 pounds, can't skate worth a damn, and has fewer points than I do (which is something, considering I thought I was the biggest scrub out there).

Now he knows I have a reputation as one who won't take this kind of crap, so anytime we were on the ice together, he was pretty quiet. Fast forward to this weekend. Every Sunday night, we have open hockey, anyone who wants to play can show up and get out on the ice for $7. I'm on the dark team, he's on the light team.

About halfway through the game, he pulls his same crap, cross-checking our guy in front of the net. This time, I was actually on the ice, right by him for that matter, so I gave him a nice little two-hander to the kidneys.

So the guy starts immediately whining about getting hit from behind. Go figure. I told him if he was so worried about getting hit from behind, then why is he doing it to everyone else, and that if he wanted to settle it, we could drop the gloves right then and there. I get to play in the league for free, I could give a damn if they kick me out for it (which they do if you get in a fight). He keeps on running his mouth while skating away. I'm not sure exactly what he said, as his four chins were impeding his speech, and besides, I'm not that fluent in cement.

Plus, I just found out today that his dad is actually a good friend of mine.  He and I have played together quite a bit.  For the record, Mr. Tough Guy has nowhere near the hockey skill of his dad or even his little brother.

The head of the league knows about him and his crap-- in fact they play on the same team in the league.  His office is right across from mine, and when I asked him who the hell the guy was, he agreed with me on the douchebaggitude of the guy.

So, any other beer leaguers out there got experience with these types? And what do you do about them? Do I go out there and challenge him again this week if he keeps trying it?

We've got open hockey again on Wednesday, no league play (the team's coaches are in Alaska, they play in the league and they don't want to miss any games). I guarantee we both will be out there. Though if anything happens it has to wait until after November 1 -- as my wife so eloquently put it, "Do what you want, just wait until your insurance is active on the first, we can't afford to blow hundreds of dollars on your uninsured ass!"

[pilferk]

You needle him, respond in kind, but let him start the fight.

Make it clear that if HE behaves, YOU'LL behave.

[Mr Cowbell ?]

Just make sure HE starts the fight so if you do get injured he will be required to pay your medical bills.

And after he starts it, FINISH IT, make sure you dont go there alone as he will probalby have some cronies around him, just make sure you let it be herd you wont take his shit, and if he doesn't like it he can leave. Theres nothign worst then one guy thinking he is the next Wayne Gretsky out there skating around like a king, when hes a chump.

[Mal Brossard]

I'm not too concerned about medical bills.  I can handle myself fine.  Though I do want to make sure he starts it, as that looks far worse on him than it does me.

Everything was canceled for tonight and Sunday, so it'll be a week before anything happens.  At the least, I'm planning on just playing my usual game (if I'm on the ice, chances are that I'm right in front of the net, either screening the opposing goalie or clearing our crease) and step up in being a pest when he's on the ice.  They never call penalties in open hockey, and rarely in league play, so there's a lot I can get away with.  And besides, the refs we have are just players on the junior team-- they won't call anything against the team's resident journalist if they know what's good for them, lol.

[JMack]

Just a little stick work that's all.  Just poke his skate or skates out or one to the back of the knee when it's busy in front.  The big dope will get tired of hitting the ice.  He'll get frustrated and get caught retaliating and go to the box.  It's the little things that I used to love to do without getting a penalty.  Sometimes I'd get one back later but that's cool, it's a tough sport.

[Layne Staley's Sunglasses]

Cowards like him can't even fight, if it were to come down to it.

I used to play hockey when I was younger, and there's a jerk like that on every team.  But when the time comes, they'll keep their gloves on and skate away.