Here Today... Gone To Hell!

This is the thread for all the practical joke lovers (haters too btw)

do you have any stories or ideas for practical jokes or anything related to practical jokes, please share them it could be real fun :yes:

have you pulled any great pranks and love practical jokes or have you gotten punked the worst way imaginable and hate them, feel free to express your feelings and shit'zah!

I do have a funny story, well let's just say, I can laugh about it now. It's more of a funniest Home Video scenario, punked I was........by my own house!

I live on clay soil so every year during seasonal rains the buliding moves several inches and the doors tend to stick. I though I'd try and fiddle with the frame from the outside to see where the sticking was. I was of course, only in a black lace nightgown and I had a hammer in my hand.

I stepped into the courtyard and shut the screen door. Bad move. It was wedged tight. I could not get it open. Lucky I had the hammer, there was nothing of use in my courtyard whatsoever apart from some river rocks. I could not exit my courtyard unless, I tried climbing a shed to jump the high fence.......in my nightgown! Not only that I'd have to walk down the street in it to the neighbours so I could use their phone! Not only that that I'd have to call the firebrigade. I had no choice but? break down the steel security door so I could get back in my house. Only way in!

I was out there for 2 hours! My hands are all cut up, there is blood on the brick wall, but I did get the door open, eventually. It is dented all over, as I tore into it with the hammer and the door frame has chunks of wood taken out of it. The only other thing I had at my disposal was chinese coin windchimes. I used the coin as a wedge between the door and frame. And the hammer broke in two! My grandfathers hammer! All the while I was saying to myself, "I am Polish, what would I have done in the war......" Finally the door was dented enough and wedged away from the frame that I could use a piece of garden wire to press in the lock.

It would have been a funny sight, me there in a glamorous gown hammering my door to bits. Luckily the builders next door weren't doing the roof that day. My only other option was to wait out there until my friend visited later that night. Hopefully she would hear my yelling for help! At least I had tap water to drink.......

I can hardly move today, after all that effort.......chunks out of my hands.........

My sister always had a weak bladder, and was the first to "go" after a holiday trip. Once before we left, I took a coat hanger, cut it to length, then streched a rubber band across the toilet seat. From there, insert the wire in the rubber band and "wind" it up like a balsa air plane. When the lid is opened, it will make a shit load of racket.

Then there is the "classic" shit in a paper bag, and put it on the front porch ... you know what to do.

Gladwrap over the toilet bowl....

Then there is the usual prosh day hi-jinks.

Like carrying the teacher's mini minor up to the second floor classrooms and parking it in the corridor.

Can be done!

Release a couple cows or other farm animals into your school and number them 1 and 3, then they spend all day looking for number 2

That's in the Hallof Fame of practical jokes.

My personal favorite is a story from my father-in-law. When he was little, he took a dump in one of his buddy's trick-or-treat bags on Halloween.? The best jokes are straightforward and simple.? And often involve shit.

Other good ones:

Beef boullion cube in the shower head.? Unsuspecting victims will come out of a hot shower smelling like meatloaf.

For apartment building dwellers, tie the door knobs of the doors of the apartments directly across the hall from each other.? Bang on both doors, hilarity ensues...

The ol' cup of water on top of the door trick.? Use a more foul liquid if you don't like the person.

Egg in the shoe.

Plenty of variations on the old pizza delivery trick.? Forget pizza, send the guy some clowns, movers, hookers, etc.

Live chicken in the high school locker.

Etc.

Etc.


In the practical jokes gone wrong department, I once sent one of my friends a phony notice from the Internal Revenue Service, stating that he owes tens of thousands in back taxes and so on (more $$$ than the guy earned in his life up to that point).? ?The guy actually brought the letter to the bar we hung out at back then, going person to person asking what he should do.? He was a complete wreck and wasn't able to sleep since he got it in the mail.? You'd think at that point, with the joke having paid off tremendously, I would have wised up and let him know it was just a joke, but no, I let it roll.? Anyway, it all went south when he called the IRS and told them there must be some mistake.? The Feds actually came to the guy's house unannounced and gave him the 3rd degree for several hours.? Of course, they eventually traced the thing to me, hunted me down and basically scared the living shit out of me with threats of prison, torture and all the rest.? Eventually, I got off with the proverbial warning.? Over 15 years later, I'm still completely paranoid that the taxman will spring the prison-rape variety audit on my ass at any given moment.

You deserve it.   :-\

Jokes I like to play on those who aren't skilled with the computer....

- Popping out the M and N keys on the keyboard and switching their positions.

- Taking a screenshot of the desktop, then setting that image as the background and unchecking the "Show Desktop Icons" option... makes it appear as if the computer is frozen.

- Changing the spell check in Word to autocorrect a frequently used word like "the"... with something like "You suck balls!"

When we were teens hanging out in the park, when a cop would drive though, we would run to get him to chase us.

:lmao: i love this thread


can you please go into more detail on that one? i'm very intrigued :)


i got a few stories-
1 happened last year, my friends and i were all on msn talking and my one friend hank is one of those people that knows everyone so he invited these chicks that go to our school. They're both pretty hot (i'd do'em) anyway we all talk in the same convo for about an hour then things wind down. Well about an hour later these girls got back online and they both at the ones house and they had the web cam on. Those two and me talked for a while and after a bit they asked if i wanted to play truth or dare. I said yes knowning that maybe i can get these two dumbass potensially drunk bitches to show me what they got. So i said yes and i started off, they said dare i'm like ok i dare you and your friend to flash me. Well little did i know there were 4 others in a convo with them as well and they all had the web cam on. So they flashed everyone including my computer savy friend, Hank. He took a 2 or 3 screen shots of them flashing us and another 2 or 3 of them making out with each other.

Now, i told you that story to tell you this one. Hank also lives with drake another friend of mine and drake thought it would be funny if we put the pics of them online and on the computers at school. We all laughed at the idea and i said not to cause maybe we can use those as blackmail some day so there like fine we won't........yet. And we didn't BUT weeks later both found out that pics were taken and hank blamed it on me cause he was trying to get in fresh with this one chick and i said tell them it was me and that way your gf wont think your the perv that you are he's like ok. so now they think its me that has the pics and everything. BUT NOW fast foward a few months and our library teacher kicks us out for being loud (which we were but we didn't give a shit) So we were all pissed and to get back at her, the teacher, we thought we should use those pics we have of the girls flashing the camera. (we thought we could get back at the teacher because it was her daughter and her friend that flashed the camera)
(key word there thought)

SO drake posts the pics on six computers in one day (2 in the actual library and 4 that are lap tops that are on a kart that go from room to room) he did it in study hall and the next room to get the computers was 7th period study hall. so about 5 little 7th graders saw the pics and so did alot of other people. 

we thought we were done because administration was starting to pull people out of class trying to catch who did it, and people on there list was me and drake thats it (cause at the time hank lived in MI) so they pull drake in first and they have the cops and everything there. They called his parents and the girls parents and more cops came in, it just turned into one bog ass fucking mess. After 2 months of grounding he got out of it all but if the parents would have pressed charges he could have gotten child pornography on his record and 1 year in juvy and 3 of probation. But thank God it didn't go down like that.

But still it was funny and we acomplished what we wanted because when they had to give all there last statments to the police the teacher thats a mother to the one girl said "well i'm sorry for all this trouble. It is as much her fault as it is drakes and i'm sorry that my duaghter is a whore". If that seems mean well GOOD its what we wanted cause that girl and her mother are the biggest bitches you'd ever want to meet. The girl is Hot but shalow and just a cunt like her mother.




another thing we did last year was there was this one kid we all called pubes because he had the really fuzzy discusting looking hair. And i only started that name on him becuase this is when my hair was just starting to grow long and i looked like i was dutch and really wierd (nothing against the dutch :peace:) so he started making fun of me and i thought that was bullshit and because he was new and when your new your not suposed to talk. Its just a rule. Damnit. so i started calling him pubes. Well he started dating this one real ugly chick that had bags under her eyes so it looked like she did heroin and coke. They broke up but she wrote him a letter ( i don't remember what it said) but my other friend Zach found it and said to me hey man we can use this some how. so i told him to save it. Then i got the idea to write back. (but i didn't write it drake did( this was also before the nudie pics incident)) So i had told drake what to write cuase he has the same shitty writting style as pubes so he worte it. And this pubes kid is really into the dragons and magic bullshit so we said in the letter something like "i want you back baby and when we get back together and when we're alone i want to pull a trick on you i like to call the "houdenie" (sp?) where i make my dick disappear and you try to find it" :rofl: it was something like that i can't fully remember. So we put it in her locker and called it good and we put the phone# of this one dude thats a total jock (we call him kelso cause he's stupid and dates a hot chick) so a day goes by nothing happens THEN people start asking around and all we see is him with a look on his face saying "ohhhh shit" ya know when your in trouble or something. Aparently what happened is the girl took the note home and showed it to her dad and he got really pissed called the school. Naterally pubes denied it all and then they found the phone # in the phone book that we put on there and he got talked too and said he didn't do it. So then he gets all depressed and even though all signs point to him he had nothing to do with it and non of us got cought. I don't think he still knows to this day who did it.

i got some more that i've done this year that i'll type up later :peace:

i got owned by a mate once.

he was like dude, come sort this problem with my computer out.

so i was clicking, and when i was clicking, it  was doing the right click thing  i was like wTF?!!! for a while

then he starts laughing and goes "i changed the options and made the left click do the right and right do the left"

i was owned.

Last year my buddy bought a brand new Harley.  I think he paid somewhere in the neighborhood of $16,000 for it.........So I took some pictures of it and posted them on Craigslist and put it up for sale at $5,000, with his phone number and to call anytime. Needless to say his phone wouldn't stop ringing and he was getting really pissed, I finally took the ad down after 2 days.


Also years ago, when we were both like 12 years old, I filled out a bunch of those cars for more info on the Army, Navy ect......and put the same guys name and number on them. He never did figure out why they kept calling and calling.

im in grade 12 right now, so me and some friends decided to start our last year off with a bang. one french teacher we all really hated, and she ALWAYS has a cup of coffee in class at her desk that shes always sippin on. So at lunch one day, me and some mates went to a shoppers drug mart and bout some exlax (spelling?). Next day in class, she was like "ill be right back. i need to print off an assignment for you guys to work on. She left the cup of coffee behind. This cued up my friend to casually walk over to the teachers cup of coffee and pour the exlax into her coffee. She finally comes back, and starts sippin away at her coffee, as me and my friend are sitting at the back laughing our asses off, waiting and hoping for the best. We were working, about 20 minutes later, she suddenly gets this sick feeling on her face, and when she walks, you could tell she was trying super hard not to shit herself. Walking so slowly, trying to hold the ass cheeks together. Another 10 minutes go by, and finally she jumps out of her desk chair, and says "Ill be right back." and runs out the class. Toss in the fact that she was wearing a skirt...well, lets just say we saw it tricklin down her leg as she ran out of the class.

ill never forget that

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

OMG man thats awesome and a true classic but next time try ipecac, that way it'll come out both ends :hihi:

:peace:

Be carefull dude, prosecutors in some districs have interpreted that as felonious assault.

do you think its posible for some one to die because of an elergic reaction to laxitive?  :nervous:

ok i'm board so here goes the things i've done this year

last week there was a football game at our school, as usual we were loosing and we were board and one of our friends got kicked out so we decided to do anything we could think of. Well a friend of mine, kowenn, is kind of a nerd, but a cool nerd and is kinda whiped by his bitch mother but any way he said that durring cross country practise (its where all the skinny lil shits run around the town (which is about a 6 or 7 mile radius)) he found a dead squiral and put it on a stop sign. I suggested to him that we put it in Richards (another friend that we like to mess with cause he never narks or gets even( i think its because he's french)) locker. He was all like ohhh we should do that. Another reason we wanted to do it is because he hates squirals don't ask why he just hates them and kinda fears them imo. so we went to go get the dead lil' thing and since its been dead for like a day it flies and shit have been flying around it (that will come into play later) so another good friend of ours that we get "illegal goods" from sometimes went through the long end of the school so we didn't have to carry a fuckin' dead squiral through the entire fuckin school. So he opened the door then i walk with him encase he had second thoughts cause i knew this would be to damn funny for it to NOT happen so i went with him and then a cheer leader walks in turned on all the lights which about scared the crap out of us so we casually walked back to the door until she left. Finally she left and we returned to Richards locker i opened the door and kowenn put it in and we shut the door. IT WAS THERE ALL WEEKEND. So now comes today, kowenn went there early so he could see if it was still there. It wasn't. Nothing was in there except a nasty ass smell of dead and rot and a residue at the bottom of the locker. So as the day goes on i hear from kowenn and Zach that aparently since the squiral had been dead for a while with all the flies and shit around it earlier that day, maggets were starting to develope and got all over everything and even ate through his books and part of his book bag and everything. I LMAO all day. The hardest part was trying to not say something and not make fun of him but we didn't. The principal had to call the janetor to come to work an hour early to clean it up.

i thought it was pretty funny. Good times..............


:peace:

I did that placing the bag in front of some sofa street sale.

Some that comes to mind,

Change the windows welcome sound to some porn and make sure it's loud. Then shut the computer off and wait.

Change your number to a friends cellphone when he goes to have a piss and change it to "police"

Dont forget the ol' "Double Decker"

Take the tank cap of your buddies toilet off, take a dump in there... Wait till some one flushes it, they'll get dukie in the bowl? :hihi:

Now thats something, i gotta do.

:rofl: i love this fuckin' thread :lmao:

that porn thing on the computer is a good idea. How do you change the sound though?

start menu->settings->control panel->sounds, Speech, and Audio Devices->change sound scheme

thanks man, i'll try it out sometime : ok:

Hey since you're still in school dude, this ones perfect!

They have links out there, that you can IM to people, that lead directly to a joke page... Porn pops up and a horn goes off, and a guy shouts "Hey everyone i'm looking at porn, look, look!!!"... Do that to a buddy while sitting in a nice quiet library? ;D

:rofl: thats awsome man : ok: do you know the link?

I love some of these jokes :rofl:.. i hate my bad memory, i remember that i did several practical jokes last week in school but i'm weird because i don't remember stuff i do in school probably because i don't sleep much at night and can't pay attention just does whatever comes to mind..

this isn't a practical joke so if your only here because you like PJ jokes u can stop read : ok:

but i find this kinda funny and it's about what i just told about my memory.. see, i'm the kinda guy that have a good confidence in myself, is pretty stubborn and thanks to internet and tv, very well-read.. so last monday i came to school and a teacher gave me a note where a word was written and a definiton of that word.. i didn't understand.. the teacher who gave me the note said that she had gotten it from another teacher and said that me and the other teacher had had an arguement about that word.. i had evidently said that the word the teacher used wasn't a real word and he had said it was.. and there had been a big arguement, so i asked my friends if it was true and if they rememberd and they did.. well this is probably only funny to me but it's still weird that i have no memory of this thing taking place? :nervous: anyway i got the note on a monday and the arguement had taken place on a wednesday so it's pretty funny that it took the teacher had thought about it for 5 days and then search for it in a dictionary to prove a 17 year old student wrong :hihi:

lol i love dumbass teachers there so fun to play with : ok: and actually thats really really sad on that teachers part

Nice!  :rofl: : ok:

When i was about 17 a few mates and myself were doing shots of rum, We gave one guy about 6 shots of vinegar before he realised, He just kept drinking them and saying "its not even burning" Until we all collapsed to the ground in hysterics.

any new ones?  ;D