Here Today... Gone To Hell!

Well, what do you think it is? It doesn't have to be epic or grand. Could be something silly or just makes you laugh whenever you hear it. Maybe it's from a movie you love or maybe one you hate. For me, whenever I hear the word "cinderella", I immediately think of Bill Murray in Caddyshack.

Cinderella story.  Outta nowhere.  A former greenskeeper, now, about to  become the Masters champion.  It looks like a mirac...It's in the hole!  It's in the hole!  It's in the hole!

Carl the groundskeeper is one of the funniest characters ever!

The greaser dude  from Dazed and Confused-"Don't let your mouth write a check where your butt can't  cash."

Yoda from Star Wars- " Fear leads to anger,anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering."

Pee Wee Herman-"Why don't you take a picture it will last longer?"

"Today, we have a special on proton charging."

everything from Pulp Fiction

Knock it off Julie
I dont need u to tell me how good my coffee is, Im the one that buys it, I know how good it is  when Bonnie goes to the store she buys shit so I buy the expensive imported cause I want to taste it.

what concerns me isnt the coffee in my kitchen, its the dead nigger in my garage.

Jules when u drove here did u see a sign outside my house that said "Dead Nigger Storage?" did u see a sign that said Dead Nigger storage?

NO

do u know why u didnt see that sign?

it isnt there cause storing dead niggers aint my fuckin business

Dont jimmy me Jules Ok

Do u realize whats gonna happen if Bonnie comes home and sees a dead body in the house?

we are gonna get divorced

not trial seperation no marriage counseling, Divorced and I dont wanna get fucking divorced

ok,

Dont jimmy me Jules, theres nothing u can say thats gonna make me forget I love my wife is there? Is there?

So u gotta make some calls, u gotta call some people? then do it and get the fuck out of my house before she gets here



That was from memory, i probably fucked a bit of it up but That whole movie is fuckin great!

Im a mushroom cloud laying motherfucker motherfucker, i am superfly TNT dynamite everytime my hands touch itty bitty pieces of brain im the guns of the navarone

"It's the one that says Bad Motherfucker on it"

I used the same fuckin' soap you did and when I got finished, the towel didn't look like no god-damn Maxi-Pad.

Now Im not giving him the money Vince, Im buying something with my money.

U know what Im buying Ringo?

Im buying your life

im gonna give u that money so i dont have to kill your ass.




What does marcellus Wallace look like

What?

What does marcellus Wallace look like

What?

Say what again, say what one more god damn motherfuckin time, I dare u, I double dare u motherfucker say what one more god damn time.

Now

What does Marcellus Wallace look like?

He's black

Go on
and he's bald

Does he look like a bitch?

What? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM ?OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

does he look like a bitch?

no No no

then why did u try to fuck him then?

I didnt ?I didnt

Yes u did bret, Yes u did

and marcellus wallace doesnt like to be fucked by anyone other than mrs wallace

do u read the bible?




this movie is so fucking awesome



I hate to shatter your ego but this isnt the first time Ive had a gun pointed in my face

if u dont take your hand off that case it will be your last.


and cant forget Bruce Willis

Bed side table on the Kangaroo, I specifically reminded her

Can I have a sip of your milkshake? I gotta know what a 5 dollar shake taste like

..........................

God damn thats a good milkshake, i dont know if its worth 5 dollars but its pretty fucking good.


How this movie lost to Forrest Gump Ill never know

This is one of the greatest films ever made and my all time favorite.

"I keep runnin' and runnin..........."


(http://tinypic.com/9uapmc.jpg)

Once we get to Hollywood and find those Miramax "expletive deleted"'s who are making that movie, we're gonna make 'em eat our "expletive deleted", then "expletive deleted" out our "expletive deleted", then eat their "expletive deleted" which is made up of our "expletive deleted" that we made 'em eat. Then all you "expletive deleted"'s are next.

We should be fuckin' dead!

Yeah, we were lucky.?

That shit wasn't luck. That shit was somethin' else.

Yeah, maybe.

That was...divine intervention. You know what divine intervention is?

Yeah, I think so. That means God came down from Heaven and stopped the bullets.

Yeah, man, that's what is means. That's exactly what it means! God came down from Heaven and stopped the bullets.

I think we should be going now.

Don't do that! Don't you fuckin' do that! Don't blow this shit off! What just happened was a fuckin' miracle!

Chill the fuck out, Jules, this shit happens.

Wrong, wrong, this shit doesn't just happen.

Do you wanna continue this theological discussion in the car, or at the jailhouse with the cops?

We should be fuckin' dead now, my friend! We just witnessed a miracle, and I want you to fuckin' acknowledge it!

Okay man, it was a miracle, can we leave now?

---

Lighten up a little. You been sittin' there all quiet.

I just been sittin' here thinkin'.

About what?

The miracle we witnessed.

The miracle you witnessed. I witnessed a freak occurrence.

Do you know that a miracle is?

An act of God.

What's an act of God?

I guess it's when God makes the impossible possible. And I'm sorry Jules, but I don't think what happened this morning qualifies.

Don't you see, Vince, that shit don't matter. You're judging this thing the wrong way. It's not about what. It could be God stopped the bullets, he changed Coke into Pepsi, he found my fuckin' car keys. You don't judge shit like this based on merit. Whether or not what we experienced was an according-to-Hoyle miracle is insignificant. What is significant is I felt God's touch, God got involved.

But why?

That's what's fuckin' wit' me! I don't know why. But I can't go back to sleep.

So you're serious, you're really gonna quit?

The life, most definitely. .

So if you're quitting the life, what'll you do?

That's what I've been sitting here contemplating. First, I'm gonna deliver this case to Marsellus. Then, basically, I'm gonna walk the earth.

What do you mean, walk the earth?

You know, like Caine in "KUNG FU." Just walk from town to town, meet people, get in adventures.

How long do you intend to walk the earth?

Until God puts me where he want me to be.

What if he never does?

If it takes forever, I'll wait forever.

So you decided to be a bum?

I'll just be Jules, Vincent, no more, no less.

No Jules, you're gonna be like those pieces of shit out there who beg for change. They walk around like a bunch of fuckin' zombies, they sleep in garbage bins, they eat what I throw away, and dogs piss on 'em. They got a word for 'em, they're called bums. And without a job, residence, or legal tender, that's what you're gonna be - a fuckin' bum!
 
Look my friend, this is just where me and you differ....

What happened was peculiar, no doubt about it, but it wasn't water into wine.

All shapes and sizes, Vince.

Stop fuckin' talkin' like that!

If you find my answers frightening, Vincent, you should cease askin' scary questions.

When did you make this decision? While you were sitting there eatin' your muffin?
Yeah. I was just sitting here drinking my coffee, eating my muffin, playin' the incident in my head, when I had what alcoholics refer to as a "moment of clarity."

I gotta take a shit. To be continued.

---

More than a line

 :smoking: Izzy? :smoking:

Napoleon Dynamite
" Gosh ! " - napoleon
" I drank some cold water, but it didn't do nothin " - pedro
" Is she hot ? " - pedro
" I like her bangs " - pedro
" Yes " - pedro

and in Anchorman
" i love lamp " - brick

Mean Girls & Clueless
" it's so fetch "
" i totally paused "
" AS IF ! "

"At my signal, Unleash Hell" (Gladiator)

"- A friend once told me death smiles at us all, the only thing we can do is smile back.
 - I wonder, did your friend smile at his own death?
 - You should know, it was your father..." (Gladiator)

"My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, (..) father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next." (Gladiator)

"Are you not entertained? ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?" (Gladiator)

All the classic lines from Pulp Fiction and Jackie Brown, obviously. The first discussion in Reservoir Dogs too.

"I never tip" (Reservoir Dogs)

"Say hello to my little friend" (Scarface)

"You know something, Nicky, you don't make no fucking sense sometimes. (Donnie Brasco)

"Forget about it" (Donnie Brasco)

...

Ask not what your rest home can do for you, but what you can do for your rest home - Bruce Campbell, Bubba Ho-Tep

Dazed And Confused:
Slater: George Washington was in a cult, and the cult was into aliens, man.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Slater: Behind every good man there is a woman, and that woman was Martha Washington, man, and everyday George would come home, she would have a big fat bowl waiting for him, man, when he come in the door, man, she was a hip, hip, hip lady, man.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Slater: This place used to be off limits, man, 'cause some drunk freshman fell off. He went right down the middle, smacking his head on every beam, man. I hear it doesn't hurt after the first couple though. Autopsy said he had one beer, how many did you have?
Mitch: Four.
Slater: You're dead, man, you're so dead. Look at the blood stains right there.

"If you strike me down, I shall become more powerfull than you can possibly imagine"

Star wars, right?

Hot shot 2

"War is Fantastic"  ;D

Mel Brooks Movies

"It's Good to be the king"

 :peace:

I will try haiku:
"Once they were men, now they are
Land crabs."  Hey, it worked!

That is from a film
"Attack of the Crab Monsters"
Get drunk; check it out!

Splash

/Mike

What you dont know about me can just about fill the fucking Grand Canyon - Chasing Amy
Hey, I always notice their bored expressions - Chasing Amy
Does this mean Bethany is black? - Dogma
Its Gods job to judge them, Its my job to arrange the meeting - Shaft

the crow

"There all dead they just dont know it yet"

Team America

"Do you have any idea how fucking busy i am"

Reservoir Dogs

EDDIE
Nobody's got a clue what happened to Mr. Blue?

MR. BLONDE
Either he's alive, or he's dead, or the cops got him, or they don't.

EDDIE
Take this the bastard you told me about? Why you beating on him?

MR. PINK
Maybe he can tell us who the fuck set us up.

EDDIE
If you fucking beat this prick long enough, he'll tell you he started the goddamn Chicago fire. Now that don't necessarily make it fucking so! Come on, man, think! All right! First things fucking last-- who's got the stones? Please, somebody, at least, tell me one little fucking favor, just for my sake.

MR PINK
I got a bag. I got a bag, OK? I stashed them to make sure this place wasn't a police station.

EDDIE
Good for you. Now, let's go get it. First, we gotta get rid of those cars outside. Looks like Sam's hot car lot out there. OK. Blondie, stay here and babysit them two. White and Pink, take a car each. I'll follow you. You ditch them. Pick up the stones. While I'm following you, I'll arrange some sort of a doctor for our friend.

MR. WHITE
We can't leave these guys here with him.

EDDIE
Why not?

MR. WHITE
'Cause he's a fucking psycho. And if you think Joe's pissed off, that ain't nothing compared to how pissed off I am at him for putting me in the same room as that bastard!

MR. BLONDE
You see what i've been putting up with, Eddie? I fucking walked in here, I told these guys about staying put, Mr. White whips out his gun, he's sticking it in my face, calling me a motherfucker, saying he's going to blow me away, and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

MR. WHITE
He's the reason the joint turned into a shooting spree. What are you, a fucking silent partner? Tell him!

MR. PINK
He went crazy in the store but he seems all right now.

MR. wHITE This is what he was doing-- Bam...Bam... Bam...Bam.

MR. BLONDE
Yeah, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam. I told them not to touch the fucking alarm, they did. If they hadn't done what I told them not to do, they'd still be alive.

MR. WHITE
(applauds) My fucking hero.

MR. BLONDE
(joins in appause, and takes a bow) Thanks.

MR. WHITE
That's your excuse for going on a kill-crazy rampage?

MR. BLONDE
I don't like alarms, Mr. White.

my fav is from Ford Fairlane..."have a twinkie...snappahead"  :hihi:

Pulp Fiction:

Butch: What now?

Marsellus: What now? Let me tell you what now. I'ma call a coupla hard, pipe-hittin' niggers, who'll go to work on the homes here with a pair of pliers and a blow torch. You hear me talkin', hillbilly boy? I ain't through with you by a damn sight. I'ma get medieval on your ass. 

Butch: I meant what now between me and you?

Marsellus: Oh, that what now. I tell you what now between me and you. There is no me and you. Not no more.

Butch: So we cool?

Marsellus: Yeah, we cool. Two things. Don't tell nobody about this. This shit is between me, you, and Mr. Soon-To-Be-Living-The-Rest-of-His-Short-Ass-Life-In-Agonizing-Pain Rapist here. It ain't nobody else's business. Two: you leave town tonight, right now. And when you're gone, you stay gone, or you be gone. You lost all your L.A. privileges. Deal?

Butch: Deal.

Marsellus: Get your ass out of here.

I'll make him an offer he can't refuse - Al Pacino - The Godfather

"Lemmy is God" - Airheads  ;D

"i make him an offer he don't refuse" - robert de niro. The Godfather part II. In fact most any line from godfather I and II is great.

"She will be mine, oh yes. She will be mine" - Mike Myers. Wayne's World. Again for wayne's world I and II

Copy cat! Beat u to it ;)

not quite. Pacino says, "i'll make him an offer he can't refuse" in the godfather. And bobby de niro says "i make him an offer he don't refuse" in the godfther II when talking about his meeting with Don Fanucci. Pedantic and sad, but if i'm going to get pedantic and sad about a movie it'll be the godfather.

Another great one

Sheriff Buford T. Justice: "I saw that you sum bitch. You did that on purpose. I got the evidence, ?put the evidence in the car junior."
Junior: "But daddy..."
Sheriff Buford T. Justice: "PUT THE EVIDENCE IN THE CAR!".

Smokey and the Bandit has so many great lines: "Duck, or you're gonna be talkin' out yo ass".
"The fact that you are a sheriff is not germaine to the issue." ? "The got-damn Germans got nothin to do with it!". ?"There's no way, no way you come from my loins. The first thing I'm gonna do when we get home is punch your momma in the mouth".

Im a living breathing eating shitting fucking santy Clause         Bad Santa



That kid is back on the escalator!!!!!!!!!!!!! Mallrats

Since we are posting best movie lines, can anybody tell me if: "What we've got here is failure to comunicate" is from a movie?, if so, which one?

Yes - Cool Hand Luke!  8)

Critics complain about  the dialouge in the Star Wars sequels , but come on...

Yoda-"Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering."

Obi Wan Kenobi-"Be mindful of you thoughts ,they can betray you."

Thats advice that helps my life everyday.

Thanks man

HEY KUJO

do the superman having sex sequence from Mallrats I dont remember exactly how it goes.







My girlfriend sucked 37 dicks!!!!!!!!!!

"In A Row?"

Why did you have to go and suck their dicks, why couldnt u just be normal and fuck them?

Hey try not to suck any dick on the way to school

slight pause


Hey u get back here!

-It's impossible, Lois could never have Superman's baby. Do you think her fallopian tubes could handle the sperm? I guarantee you he blows a load like a shotgun right through her back. What about her womb? Do you think it's strong enough to carry her child?
-Sure, why not?
-He's an alien, for Christ sake. His Kyrptonian biological makeup is enhanced by earth's yellow sun. If Lois gets a tan the kid could kick right through her stomach. Only someone like Wonder Woman has a strong enough uterus to carry his kid. The only way he could bang regular chicks is with a kryptonite condom. That would kill him.

Thanks I love that!

Jason Lee has a TV series called "My name is Earl" which starts on NBC on Tuesdays this fall, I cant wait to watch it as Jason Lee is one of my all time fav actors.



If we dont get this boat for Lefty, Fuckin Forget about it

Im not becoming like them Maggie, I am them     Johnny Depp Donnie Brasco



If Donnie calls, tell him if it had to be anyone, Im glad it was him  Al Pacino Donnie Brasco

-When I introduce you, I'm gonna say, "This is a friend of mine." That means you're a connected guy. Now if I said instead, this is a friend of ours that would mean you a made guy. A Capiche?
-What do I call you?
-You keep your fucking mouth shut about me!

ok, this isn't from a movie, but Im a huge Sopranos fan so here it is.
Little Steven (guitarist in E Street band and a regular actor on the show) and another guy are discussing people that have died while they were taking a shit. the other guy mentions Elvis, and Little Steven, thinking of Don Simpson, says... "and that Hollywood guy, Don something, the producer of Simpsons" :hihi:

"Good... Bad... I'm the guy with the gun"

Bruce "Ash" Campbell
Army of Darkness

One of the funniest movies ever made...The big Lebowsky

Bunny Lebowski: I'll suck your cock for a thousand dollars....Brandt can't watch, though, or he has to pay a hundred.
The Dude: I'm just going to find a cash machine

Well, I'm a huge Sopranos fan too, but Deadwood has a lot of classic lines as well!

Tom Nuttall: My bicycle masters boardwalk and quagmire with aplomb. Those that doubt me... suck cock by choice.

Al Swearengen: Pain or damage don't end the world. Or despair. Or fuckin' beatings. The world ends when you're dead. Till then you've got a lot more punishment in store. So stand it like a man, and give some back.

Trixie: Tread lightly who lives in hope of pussy.

Ellsworth: I may have fucked up my life flatter'n hammered shit, but I stand here before you today beholden to no human cocksucker, and holdin' a workin' fuckin' gold claim, and not the U.S. government tellin' me I'm trespassin', or the savage fuckin' red man or any of these other limber-dick cocksuckers passin' themselves off as prospectors had better try and stop me.

I Am Connor Macleod of The Clan Macleod And Once A Very Long Time Ago I Was A Highlander

There Can Only Be One

Classic Highlander stuff :smoking:

"Made it ma, top of the world" cagney in white heat

"I don't need to be lectured by you. I was out saving the galaxy when your grandfather was in diapers. Besides which, I think the galaxy owes me one. " Kirk Generations

From Star Trek Insurrection
Anij: Have you ever experienced, a perfect moment in time?
Captain Picard: A perfect moment?
Anij: When time seemed to stop, and you could almost live, in that moment.
Captain Picard: Seeing my home planet from space, for the first time.

I've got a couple i like:

"I'll make him an offer he can't refuse" - Don Michael Corlenone talking about his proposition to Moe Green The Godfather

"They can take our lives, but they'll never take, our freedom!" William Wallace's speech to the Scottsh soldiers in Braveheart

"The force will be with you. Always." Obi-Wan Kenobi's final living words to Luke Skywalker in Star Wars

"Our amps go to 11...because 11 is louder than 10" - Nigal Tuffnel showing off his 11-Setting Amp in This Is Spinal Tap

"I love the smell of napalm in the morning. Smells like victory" American CO in Vietnam in Apocolapse Now!



 

It's going to be blood for blood and by the gallon. These are the old days, the bad days, the all-or-nothing days. They're back!

Sin City

From Ferris Bueller's Day Off:

"Life moves pretty fast, you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." 

 "My best friend?s sister?s boyfriend?s brother?s girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who?s going with the girl who saw Ferris pass out at 31 Flavors last night. I guess it?s pretty serious.?

From Spaceballs:

"Thank you for pushing the self-destruct button, this ship will self-destruct in 30 seconds..."

"This ship will self-destruct in 20 seconds, this is your last chance to push the cancellation button"

From Bill & Ted:

"what you're telling me, essentially, is that Napolean is a short, dead dude?"


Ghostbusters:

"Ray, when someone asks if you're a God, you say "Yes"! "

 "Normally, you don't see that kind of behavior in a major appliance."

Maybe the greatest movie line ever.

"Ya know, I like you Clarence. Always have... *Finger snap/point* Always will!"

Not from a movie, but this cracks me up every time I watch my DVD of this show. Major respect points for whoever knows what show it is from:

- I never let sex get in the way when I'm hunting for blood
- For me its the other way around

Is that from "Greg the Bunny"?

Ricky Slade Here's scenario B for you Bob, see how you feel about this one. Now I don't know if you've noticed this or not, but I think I'm starting to get under Ruiz's skin as well, OK? It all started with the whole Red Dragon, or the Welsh guy, whatever, they can play it down all they want but you know 200 grand's a lot of fucking money! It's a fucking lot of money! OK? 200 grand is definitely a lot of fucking money! And now I've got Ruiz calling me fucking Fruit-Pie the fucking magician! Tellin' me that I can't fucking call my main man Max, who fucking sent me out on the fucking operation? And what about the Welsh guy? He's fucking scat all over, they fucking disappear and talk! And you haven't noticed this either but when he's not fucking looking at me or you're fucking doing whatever, I've got fucking Jimmy in the mirror with his shit too. It's fucking coming at me from here, I don't know where it is! It might be coming this way, it might be coming that way, but the fucking shit's coming and I'm not gonna be late for the fucking dance man, I'm not gonna be fucking late for the dance on this one.

Bobby You're not getting a gun.

Forgot.... this is from one of my favorite movies ever - Made

I'll be back

-Terminator 2

"God Kills indiscriminately, and so shall we" Lestat - Interview with the vampire.
"I've got the microphone and you don't so you will listen to every god damned word I've got to say" - The Wedding Singer
"... and since we do our first class passenger do pretty much whatever they want, here it is" The Wedding Singer.  :peace:

They can suck my pathetic little dick, and I'll dip my nuts in marinara sauce just so those fat bastards can get a taste of home while they're at it.

The Boondock Saints

The Dude abides. - The Big Lebowski. 
That's one of like 600 hundred great lines from that movie.  In my opinion the funniest movie ever made.

Yes. The episode when they all went paintballing

BLAME CANADA!!! ;D - South Park

(I dont really mean that - Im from Canada)

One of my favorite lines comes from The Mothman Prophecies.

"John Klein"(Richard Gere): I think we can assume that these entities are more advanced than us. Why don't they just come right out and tell us what's on their minds?

"Alexander Leek"(Alan Bates): You're more advanced than a cockroach, have you ever tried explaining yourself to one of them?

Monty Python

"Now for somthing COMPLEATLY Different"

"Mr Tibblywink has learnt the 1st rule of Cameoflauge, do not stand up"

"Its Not dead - its pinin'"

"Thats nothing!! I used to live in a rolled up newspaper in a caustic tank!"

 :hihi:  :rofl:  :hihi:

ok i have some more:

"'Tis only a fleshwound..." - The black knight in Monty Python and the Holy Grail after his arms were hacked off

"You wanna catch Capone, I'll show you how to catch Capone. They pull out a knife, you pull out a gun. They send one of yours to the hospital(?) you send one of thier's to the morgue. Thats how you catch Capone." - Sean Connory in The Untouchables

"Woah! Stairway denied!" - Wayne in Wayne's World when he attemps to play Stairway to Heaven in the guitar store.

Mwahahaha I love it!!!

I have more:

"Wait till biggus Dickus Hears about this"

"Who you calling Big nose?  Big Nose!!"

"That isnt at all silly, you mearly do a a tripple half leg pike on every alternate step"

"I wasn't Pickin' i was scratchin'"

The Life Of Brian!