Here Today... Gone To Hell!

i get depressed alot over just about everything. i think i might have bipolar disorder or something. i also have anxiety and im shy. these things really fuck your life up. i wondering if any1 else has problems like these aswell.

I think everybody experiences these things to one degree or another.  I know I have.  I can get really anxious being around people, but I've found that if I go "all out," and just act absurdly confident, it gets easier each time.   : ok:

don't try an self analyse yourself. i've got checklists for mental diseases and it's incredible what i've diagnosed myself with.

i don't want to downplay your situation, but it could come about from something a simple as temporary hormonal imbalance or even poor diet. if you are worried about it go speak to someone.

uni-polar and bi-polar depresson (dysthymia is also a possibility) are illnesses; if you want to help yourself go see a councillor.

It's been just over a year since i got depression and im pulling through but i still get my very bad days and im a full blown nutcase cos of the anti-depressants..it's hard to control ur emotions when ur like this. I also am very very shy. Having these 2 problems aint great for my confidence man i can tell u.

I remember last year, I got really depressed for a long time after my dog died.  I still had happy days, but there was just a general sense of gloom about the whole thing.  For a time, I even became almost pseudo-goth; I dyed my hair black, teased it, listened to The Cure, and even wore lipstick one day (although it was pink, because that's all I could find, but hell, I'm more of a glam-rocker kind of dude anyway).  Even when I was happy, there was always that hurt in the back of my mind.  But over time, I started to feel better.  These days, I'm pretty much normal.  I have happy, hopeful periods, and occasional bleak depressing days.  But I feel I can cope with problems better these days.

(http://www.sanjose.com/nightlife/gifs/paparoach9-0024.jpg)

COBY FEELS YOUR PAIN!!

I actually think Papa Roach is a severely underrated band.  They write a lot of catchy songs.

I feel ya dude, i have battled with manic depression,shyness,anxiety,paranoia,being a hypochondriac just everything.

One thing that really has helped me out is creating music, the other is just realizing i am unique and not crazy.

nothing wrong with being the way u are, i find a beauty in how i am, i enjoy being different and not like everyone else.

another thing i do, is i try not to dwell on things i cant control.

if u knock over a glass and spill your water all over the place and the glass breaks, dont get upset, just clean it up and get another glass

people tend to worry and get upset over the smallest most trivial things.

if something happens, its over, its done, u cant change it, cant redo it, so just let it go, dont dwell and drive yourself up a wall over it.

also get into exercising, lifting weights, hitting on punching bags, jogging or bicycling.

exercise releases natural antidepressants and when you put all ofyour negative depressed maniacal energy into these activities, u build a better body *which helps the shyness*and it just makes u feel better about yourself.

pick up a guitar dude

nothin like playin some loud ass distorted music full of blast when u feel like killing eveyone.



DO NOT DO DRUGS

drinking and drugs accelerate your condition and make it worse over time, plus you dont get the gift of growing as a person and learning about yourself. Once u get thru the worst, it is an awesome gift when u get that inner peace and joy.

In my opinion, attending to psychologists is not the best solution, is the last thing you should do. You're possibly a teenager and it's rational to have an often mood change.
The best thing you can do to get happier is starting having better thoughts from now on. Most people remain sad because they constantly have unfavorably thoughts. Start having optimistic thoughts. When someone is constantly sad, he's stamping those bad thoughts in his subconscious. Having good thouts is just a habit. Practise on that.
So, good thoughts and plans. Have ideals and have a purpose in your life. After you decide what's the real thing you wanna do, put yourself and your heart on that target and never let anyone stand in your way.
Don't be shy and don't fear about anything. Having fear is like a bird that hasn't wings to fly. Act confident. Teddy Rusvelt once said, that by pretending he wasn't afraid of anything he really stopped being afraid when he grew up. Ensure yourself everyday that you're able to handle any problem you may encounter, that you're competent and a reasonal person.
Reading is a good way to boost your confidence. Be calm in your moves. If something makes you wanna cry or yell, hold back. Don't cry or yell. You won't earn anything byt doing those things. Instead you're leting the sorrow to surround you. If you remember in the past you may cried for some reason. The problem passed and the distresses remained. Take every sad moment as temporary storm. Tomorrow's a better day. Avoid depressing movies or shows, news. It's a pity when people are seeking to see a drama. They want to be sad, to cry, to be unhappy. Try to enjoy every moment in your life. Observe the nature, the sky, the animals, the trees. I think hapiness is not a continual streaming. Hapiness in our life is small parts that should be multiplied. You can be happy by listening good music, or even drinking a juice or water with pleasure. Weren't you happy when you heard for the first time a great gn'r song ?;)? Enjoy every good thing you experience. Don't be like some people that every new thing they obtain looses its value. A pet can give you some hapiness and can absorb your worries if the place you live is depressing. If you think you have a problem ensure yourself you're gonna surpass it. Sometimes it's good when we have drawbacks, because when we surpass them we get happier. If you have stress, isolate yourself in your private room, sit down, and stay moveless for a guarter, even half an hour and breath without thinking anything. You can go over again more than once in a week. Doing that exercise, (focusing on your breath and not in any annoying thought you oppose the anxiety). You can put some relaxing music also (not rocker or blues stuff :P, every thing deserves the right time to be done ?:)).Don't be mean or jealous, because that's a source for sorrow. Be thankful when someone helps you. You get happier by doing that and never be ungrateful. Because thanklessness is the worst thing in the world.
Take care of yourself and try to be good-looking, not for the girls but for yourself, when you know you look good, you feel good too. Ignore what the others say when you have a plan. When you're to realise the plan you have, people think you're crazy, but when you make it they praise you afterwards. Don't care what the others say about stuff you like (music e.t.c.), besides lots of persons think they're right and they consider wrong the other's opinions.
I hope I gave you some good advices. Sorry for my english, I'm trying my best. I hope I helped a little. Remember, noone needs the sorrow. There's no difference between a person who is happy and a person who is not. Hapiness is attitudinal and depends on how we percieve every moment in our lives. Life's a game, the one and only good game. If you deny to play it you'll loose the greatest of pleasures.

Stay away from legal drugs too, unless it is a last resort.

Eliminate processed sugar (inluding white rice, white bread etc etc) from your diet and keep a good balance of food in your system, including drinking enough water. Most of us don't drink enough water and many are at certain levels of dehydration, which also plays a role in our mood/feeling/energy.

Diet has a dramatic effect on mood, you will be suprised on how much it can change the way you feel in your body and your mind.

wow that took along time to read. it helped alot though. i also regret alot of things which sucks. things like spending money on things i dont need, regreting not asking a girl out. that really sucks is there anyway of getting over things like that?

No way but to change your way of thinking. Guilt and regret will kill you.

What you did yesterday is DONE. What you will do tomorrow has not happened yet. Focus on this very instant and you will be happy. Anything else is a waste of your time RIGHT NOW.

Also, don't feel sorry for yourself. We all do, and it's tough to change that. You have to step back and look at your thoughts on your own and be honest about what you were just thinking and why.

It's called growing up too...some people do it, many do not. It's hard, that is for sure.

Listen carefully: The hardest things to do, give you the most benefits in life. Don't forget that.

Good luck.

I was debressed, but now I'm better. I've stopped taking anti-debressants after talking to my doctor and when I did that I started doing sports again.

It helped a lot to start hitting the gym again, not to mention my new gf.
Everything just seems to fit, and it's harder to get me down.

Now, only if I would get a job with a good pay...

i was on antidepressents i was fine for a while. i'll talk more and i was feeling good. and then later i went crazy i was laughing at things that werent funny, acting like a dickhead. it was like i was stoned. so i got taken off them.

I don't recommend antidepressents. They seem like drugs to me.
If the past was bad, don't worry. The important thing is where we are heading.

I agree that people need love, it's in our nature. Love makes us more confident and makes us forget unpleasing things. However if there's a girl you like and she dislikes you or doesn't want you despise her. Be carefull, many people destroyed their lives seeking for a love that never had response. One sided-love is a disaster.

About asking girls... that's a tough subject.
One thing to do first...
Pythagoras, the greek mathematic and occultist said: "First of all, appreciate yourself."
People that don't have self-esteem are recognized by others. They don't like them. How's possible people to like you, when you don't like yourself? ???

Now that you learned how important self-confidence is, try the next level.
One thing you can remember is that you should ask a girl out and not just sitting in the corner and watch her. Why? Because if you make your effort either you reach your goal either you get rejected. But that's better from doing nothing. At least you have a chance to have a girl. If you don't do something you'll never have one? :-\. Man's beauty is not necessary. I think you agree with me. Haven't you seen an unattractive man and next to him a good-looking girl? and said what the heck? afterwards? There's no treaty saying beautiful people deserve beautiful people.

Never let you believe they're all the same. They're not. You get rejected the first time? So? You're not the first one. Don't expect to have a girl the first time you ask a girl out. Try again and again till you find some worth. Most men fail in their lives because they postpone things and don't make another effort.
So, some of them like stuff, money, fame, cars while some of them like to have a good partner not a cheater. Don't worry if you don't have stuff like money, cars e.t.c. it's not that bad. Women that like material stuff and not the man himself are usually beautiful but not really worth. That's why some marriages fail. The couple is drifting from a quick passion, not from real love. So, they divorce when the passion passes.

When you approach a girl, be natural, don't use silly words that offend the girl's dignity. Respect the girl. Tell, her e.g. Hi, my name's Bill, what's yours? I can see you're busy now (if she's with her friends). but I'm sitting over there with my friends, so if you like come later so we could have a talk, otherwise I'm wishing you to have a good day. Try to be calm, it's not that bad to be a little nervous. At least she'll think you're not doing that every day if you're a bit nervous.
Go back to your place, don't look at her again. (Never be too easy to the girls). She'll think you had the guts, she may also wonder if you really like her or not.
That's it. Stuff like that, you'll find a lot later. If you feel afraid to go don't worry, asking girls out is something that's getting easier and easier each time. Think that asking it's something funny, we don't have anything to loose.

Women are attracted from men that like to have the upper hand. Confidence is the attitude they like. The man that knows what to do next. The man that doesn't say I'm looser, and isn't not impressed by other's stuff like cars or houses.
They may say they like good boys and not cheaters but they also like the mystery in a man. That's why some of them like bad boys. They also like the success at man. Succede in your life and you'll see thay you will be a more magnetic person. Be determinative, suggest her where you want to go out tonight. Don't please her always. If you always say yes, whatever you like and stuff like that, you're too easy. I think she looses the interest later.
So, make an effort.... nothing to loose :)

I always refused to take medication.

I took a mix of xanax and prozac some 9 years ago because i was in the deepest form of depression known to psychiatry, i was in catatonia and nothing or no one would find echo in me, i would not feel happy or sad, i would not even feel hurt.

If that hadn't worked, i would have been put in a clinic.

I got so addicted to the Xanax that when i realised i was hooked on that shit, i then promised myself that however deep in the pit i'd find myself, i would not take medication ever again.

I then entirely relied on therapy, and hypnosis, knowing it won't go away, but it'll make it a tad better.

Plus, the catatonic state is something i have no risk of knowing ever again.

I've had it, still have it sometimes-people can usually tell if I'm sad, they will say "don't you look happy today", and I don't even realize I give off that vibe sometimes.  What I hate is that I'm usually depressed in the present, but a year from now, I can look back and think "that wasn't so bad"-it's hard to explain-the worst part was in Vegas last year spending most of the time in my hotel room. :no: It's experiencing a lot of extreme highs and lows sometimes.

that sounds good i wish i had that catotonic thing

im very shy and i suffer from anxiety too. im depressed quite often, because im an outcast at school and i have a sucky social life (like 4  friends). i have hardly any self-confidence at all. i always think i look like a loser, no matter what i wear or whatever. i hardly make eye contact with people when im talking, because i feel too ashamed of myself to do so. i mumble, because i dont think ppl care about what i have to say.

i think that my life is pretty much a disaster, and i always feel it will never get considerably better. i have an occasional good day, but i usually have shitty, depressing days. occassionally, i'll throw tantrums when something minor happens (like when i spill a glass of milk or can't open a jar of something.)

about a year ago, i was sort of "getting out of my shell" in terms of shyness. there was this girl that i really liked, and i started talking to her a lot. i wanted to go out with her, so i started making friends with a bunch of people (to improve my image and seem like a cool guy). I was going to ask her out at a dance, but i never got a chance, b/c she was never alone. After that i gave up on her, and a few months later i gave her the finger in front of a group of people. she was really hurt/pissed off, and we havent really talked much since.  i couldnt get her out of my mind, and I gave her the finger because i wanted to give up and stop bothering with her. i still like her, but i think she's probably out of my league and she wont "honestly" forgive me for flippin her off.

OMG your life is the same as mine. i have 4 freinds and i never get a good opportunity to ask girls out. anyway i think evry1 on this bored has got sick of me moping and hating myself so from now on i'll only make positive posts  :hihi:

haha... its good sometimes just as D said use a creative form to express your feelings. personally i journal almost everyother day.... or more if im really down and it helps me alot. im also on some anti-dp's.... but thats besides the point they will only ever get you part of the way. i have a friend that does poetry when hes down and another that writes short stories, ive tried both and i do find journals help me out the most.... though sometimes my journal may be a poem ... or a short story.

see dude, this is where the "be yourself" shit comes in.

Dont change for anyone ever, if u have to be someone else to be liked, its not gonna work out anyway.

why did u flip her off? dude that couldve been a huge mistake or the greatest thing u ever did.

sometimes before u can make someone love u, u have to make em hate u.

some of my best friends are people who i use to hate and they use to hate me.

just start back talkin to her and be honest, tell her why u flipped her off, tell her u like her and u want to ask her out but u got frustrated.

make up some bullshit

tell her u started to really like her but got scared of rejection and being hurt, so u flipped her off to protect yourself from getting hurt. some girls eat that kind of shit up.

U got to take the chances though, if u expect to sit around and some hot chick just walk up to u and ask u out, u are gonna be single for a very very long time.

u gotta realize also that most girls are just as shy and insecure as u are.

take another crack at it.

u proved that if u really want to, u can make people like u and make friends. so dont give up

if u break out of your shell and this girl doesnt dig u, dont sink back down into your old ways, keep movin forward and maybe this will lead u down the road to finding who u are suppose to be with.

When u talk, act like what u have to say is the most important thing ever said and people will listen. trust me, its all in how u carry yourself, act like u are big shit until u become big shit.

You have to be confident, not cocky.  I roll my eyes at people that act like they are "big shit" or think whatever they say is the most important thing ever.

You need to be careful not to cross the line between being cocky and being confident.  I've had a few friends who get this "I'm hot shit" attitude once things start to go their way.  It's enough for me to stop hanging out with them.

well, you got point there. although some of the friends i made came to me last year.


i flipped her off, b/c i thought that would make her stop talking to me, and that would cause me to forget about her. that didnt work? :no:

hmm.... that third part you said is actually kind of accurate. i tried talking to her on AIM back in January, and i did surprisingly well for 30 mins. we got caught up with each other (since we hadnt talked in months). i havent talked to her since, cuz im afraid i won't have anything to say.


hmm... i dont know about her being shy. she's definitely NOT one of those girls who gossips all the time and never shuts up. thats a thing i liked about her. i felt that i could talk to her about problems i have, without worrying about getting exposed.


yeah, when i get out of this depression (probably ill be better next school year), ill try talking to more people. i have more to talk about with ppl than i did a year ago, so i might have a good chance.

let me get this straight, u talked to her for 30 minutes but havent talked to her since?

do u like this girl or not?

if u do u are gonna blow it cause i think she likes u honestly but if u keep ignoring her she is gonna move on and say screw it.

dont worry bout goin blank, just be honest and yourself and just talk to her
when u run out of shit to say, tell her u gotta go do something and log off.

but dont ignore her completely

i highly doubt she likes me. she had a boyfriend about 2 weeks ago, and even if she didnt, she still never really talks to me. maybe ill talk to her again if i get the chance. i rarely see her in school so i'd have to do it on aim.

Nothing beats depression like taking a chick to a strip club man.? That + Jack Daniels and Paradise City playing somewhere.? Why don't you get really nice in pool or something.? For a dude like you who has LOADS of time on his hands you should look into something like that.? Get REALLY good and then go to a pool hall or bar.? You would totally impress the crowd no matter how shitty your social skills are or even how horrid you might look.? Nothing gets people to appreciate you like some type of cool skill.? : ok:

Be careful of drinking to cure depression/shyness-I've done it with girls-of course it makes it easier to loosen up, but it ususally makes things worse-just be yourself-I'm not preaching-I still drink-mostly due to shyness-but it seems to make a lot of things worse in the long run.

You hit your new girlfriend?

lol, no :)

hitting your GF is also a slang term for Fucking your GF

so........................... :hihi: :hihi: :hihi: :hihi: :hihi: :hihi:

i'm Bi-Polar, have had it for the last 4 yrs.  Take 600 mgs of Seroquel and 2 mgs of Klonopins as needed.  And being a musician had tons of problems with getting onstage, talking to women, etc.  If you think you're depressed, quit drinking so much, meditate, take vitamins, watch your diet, and excersise.  And go see a shrink!!  It's like the doc told me, if your'e depressed, (or bi-polar like in my case) treat the illness like how a diabetic would treat diabetes, the same way like I suggested above.  If you don't treat it, it could be fatal.  If you do treat it the way I say, you can actually have a more productive life than most others.  Because you can see the pitfalls in life and side-step them.  Hell life has never been better for me, playing gigs, going out with women, etc.  YOu've just gotta take the first step.  Kinda like AA :rofl:

i want to get help and get antidepressents but im too embarassed to tell mum about it. i know its stupid. anyway rick james when u get depressed just think at least your not blind. there couldnt be anything worse than that. i hope i never go blind.

I think it would be hard to diagnose a teenager

life is confusing and fucked up as a teenager, so drugs may distort and fuck up your mental growth.

being a teenager is tough, but u just have to persevere and survive it and try to come out alive.

life is weird, u never get 2 happy, and just when u are ready to slit your throat something good happens.

depression and sadness lead to personal growth

let that growth happen and u will become strong!

Knowing who you are as a person and recognize what sets it off and why, it is a lot easier to manage.  Not sure if it ever goes away, but what really helps is understanding it and knowing how to cope with it. Tell yourself - I can sit here and feel down or I can fight it and do something about it because in the end, its up to me and I deserve more than that.  Finding a positive outlet helps, what D mentioned before, hitting the gym or music is great. That worked for me.

unless u are hearing voices and they are tellin u to do evil shit, i wouldnt see a doctor.

Parents put there kids on ritalin and all sorts of bullshit drugs that rob em of their childhood.

all i can say is, being confused and depressed is part of growing up

the quicker u realize that life is like a huge fuckin game and u will win some, lose some and the trick is like GNRFL said to understand what triggers it and learning to cope and deal with that.

A wise man named SLCPunk once told me that u determine how u feel and are responsible for how u react to certain situations.

very true there, u can feel like shit, feel sorry for yourself and waste your life being depressed and down, or u can get off your ass and do something positive about it.

always try to turn a negative situation into a positive reaction.

i remember the first time I got dumped and had a broken heart

i couldve handled it negatively and did drugs and became an alcoholic but i didnt

i started lifting weights, writing songs, running and i am now a pretty damn good songwriter and musician, i got an above average body and I am stonger within cause I dealt with pain and conquered it.

My best friend of 17 yrs I am almost ready to give up on. He is so depressed, he can not, and WILL NOT change his way of thinking. It is his outlook on life that makes him miserable. I have tried in vain to point this out to him, but it only makes him angry. He makes more than me, and works less. Yet he is horrible with his money. So he is depressed because he "makes good money, but has nothing." He eats horrible food and is sad because "he is overweight and fat" , yet refuses to change his eating habits. He is the creator of his own pain and misery. I can not get through to this guy, and at this point, his constant complaining and bitterness has pushed me away. I can't stand talking to him anymore....it's always negative.

So that is a perfect example of perception becoming reality.

I make less then him, but use my money wisely. I eat more than him, but eat healthier foods and exercise. Just for starters my life is totally different.

But the bottom line is thankfulness. It is easy to feel sorry for yourself. So easy. But if you are truly thankful that will fall aside (self pity). He is not thankful for anything. Instead he chooses to focus on his own life and feel sorry for himself. Instead of seeing how little work he does for the amount of money he makes.

It is hard to be thankful, especially when life is kicking you in the ass. I got some crap news today (always money) and it bummed me out. I had to come home, regroup my head and deal with it via thankfulness. I have no choice.

Life is not fair and it never will be. You can not change that.

Once you take yourself out of the equation things get easier.

Medicine is (this is almost another topic altogether) given out to freely and we don't look at how our diet affects our moods and physical condition (which really go hand in hand). We have a high sugar and fat diet in this country. With all the physcial ailments that have taken their toll on this country (cancer, heart disease, diabetees) you'd think they would take a closer look at emotional issues correlated with diet as well. Instead we continue on with poor diet/no exercise and pop a pill when the numbers look wrong. Preventative maintenance is really the key, ie diet, exercise, and thankfulness.

.02

My parents put me in therapy when I was 17, because I was too "mellow". I wasn't enthusiastic about life.  :hihi:  I liked my psychologist, she was cool. We mainly talked about men, her ex-husband in particular. I took Zoloft for maybe a month. Flushed it down the toilet. I decided I could work things out for myself. Writing became essential in that process. Writing fictional stories and poems allowed me to escape from my worries and depression.

I know what u mean. there's these kids i hang around with at school. i found out that 2 of the guys there and 2 of the girls suffer from deppresion and 2 of them are on medication and 2 of them cut their wrists. it shocked me cause they look so happy and they talk so much. they go to partys and shit on the weekend aswell so y are they so unhappy

One of my good friends has bouts of severe depression and self-medicates with alcohol and cheap sex.? A few times, she's even cut herself with razors and knives.? She calls me in tears atleast one night aweek and sounds so hopeless.? It breaks my heart.? I don't know how to help her.
 

first of all u should try to understand if u are really suffering from depression. just remember that depression is very common (15% of the population suffers from it) so theres nothing to be ashamed of.

here are some questions that u should ask yourself in order to clear things up:

-how is your mood?
-do u cry often?
-do u still enjoy things u used to like?
-do u feel tired?
-are there some things u find interesting/enjoyable?(e.g. listening to gnr?)
-can u concentrate? when u read the paper or watch the news can u remember afterwards what u read or saw?
-do u get angry easily?
-do u get panic attacks?
-do u suffer from headaches?
-does your mood change during the day?(e.g.do u always feel better in the morning and worse in the night?)
-do u suffer from insomnia?
-how is your appetite? have u lost weight?
-do u want to have sex?(obviously u do as u talk about that girl :hihi:)
-do u feel guilty or regret about things?
-do u have low self esteem?
-how do u see your future?
-are there times when u go to sleep and u wish u never woke up again?
-do u ever think about suicide?

depression is divided into 2 major categories:mild and severe.if u suffer from mild depression u dont need to take any drugs-psychotherapy is enough.however if u have severe depression i would advise u to take medication as theres a high possibility of commiting suicide.

here are some things that can help u determine if u suffer from mild or severe depression.

in mild depression people find it difficult to fall asleep whereas in severe depression patients wake up early.

patients suffering from mild depression have normal or increased appetite, have normal or increased weight and still have desire for sex.on the other hand patients suffering from severe depression have reduced appetite, lose weight and have no desire for sex.

finally patients suffering from mild depression feel worse in the afternoon whereas those who have severe depression feel worse in the morning

boy that was along post-hope that helped a little bit :peace:

Most of the times I got hit with depression were when relatives of mine passed away as a teenager. Not only that, even moving out of the house I grew up with them since I was born. During that period of time, the perfect song that described me was "Fade to Black" by Metallica.


You just got to make choices you're comfortable with, it depends on what friends you have too. You also become depressed by trying to be something you're not . Don't get caught up with friends you have to change just to impress them, really the only person you have to impress is yourself. True friends let their friends be themselves.

Great words SuperMike!   :beer:  I agree.

cheers to you too :beer:

My father is very depressed he want to kill himself and I don't know what to do i feel very down right now, is so sad to see my dad in that way  :(

First off, I'm very sorry, that's got to be a horrible feeling.  Have you spoken at length with him about this?  I have so much trouble understanding deep depression.  I've felt like shit before, but never to the point I thought it wouldn't get better.  Is he in otherwise good health?  Does he exercise?  Does he have a close confidante?  Can he laugh?  Has he been to a doctor?? 

Just wondering.  :(

Well actually he went to a doctor this friday I went with him, the doctor told him to stay in bed only at nights and in the morning he have to do something like walk or reading and stuff, but my father wants to stay in bed doing nothing he feels bad but he doesn't know why, our current economic situation is very good nothing to be depressed for I first though it was about this, but it wasn't, I have talked to him and told him if we can go out to do some biking cause he likes it, and nothing he just want to stay in his room, is very sad. Yesterday I notice a little improve, he stayed away from bed and do some things about the house like start to paint or make some budget for it, and do some car repairs and stuff that I think is good but I only hope he stays like that.

I lost another friend today.? He is blunt and always says what he thinks - and what he thinks is that i'm stupid, lazy and spoiled.? He said I have never worked hard in my life and it shows.? He's probably right.

I know my good aspects and my flaws.? I know I am a kind person: unselfish, friendly and not in the least bit judgemental.? I am proud of how laid back I am - I am loyal to my friends and I have good perspective (usually).

But he's right and I can't escape it.? My girlfriend dumped me last year because she saw me for what I really was (a lost cause? :-\).? Since then all of my flaws have been exposed for everyone to see.? I do have friends who respect me but many people lost respect for me a long time ago, including her.? I'm trying so hard to turn things around - I know the key is to look to the future and forget about the past but I do care about what people think of me and things just aren't getting any better at the moment. :-[


I'm sorry to hear about your dad Dick Purple.

I feel for you... really, and I understand you... I'm shy, also, yeah. I hope you'll can suddenly feel better.

Natasha

Thanks, I'll keep trying to help him I hope he let us (family).

i have depression and anxiety and have had it for many years. it will go away sometimes, or so you think and then bam, it comes back from no where. i dont take medicines, i guess thats a mistake too, i try to handle it but its hard, you see ive had the prob since i was very young and then it went away some, and then my husband died of cancer at age 36 and i have raised 2 kids by my damn self and they have turned out pretty good, but i get very angry that had to happen, why me? so see things are pretty rough for alot of people, all you can do is take 1 day at a time and get some help for your anxiety,,its a fucked up feeling to have to deal with. Good luck to you.

-how is your mood?
It's good

-do u cry often?
Can't

-do u still enjoy things u used to like?
Yeah

-do u feel tired?
I can't sleep

-are there some things u find interesting/enjoyable?(e.g. listening to gnr?)
Yup.

-can u concentrate? when u read the paper or watch the news can u remember afterwards what u read or saw?
If I really put my mind to it.

-do u get angry easily?
I get "edgy"

-do u get panic attacks?
I've had a few let at night and thought about things too much

-do u suffer from headaches?
Yeah, migrens

-does your mood change during the day?(e.g.do u always feel better in the morning and worse in the night?)
Yes.

-do u suffer from insomnia?
Yes.

-how is your appetite? have u lost weight?
Yes, now I'm back in toned condition

-do u want to have sex?(obviously u do as u talk about that girl hihi)
All the time.

-do u feel guilty or regret about things?
No, I don't feel guilt

-do u have low self esteem?
No

-how do u see your future?
I don't know

-are there times when u go to sleep and u wish u never woke up again?
Yeah.

-do u ever think about suicide?
Tried that.

may i ask why?



may i ask how?

pm'd ya

Hi guys, this is the first time i havent posted about gnr. but some of the things in this thread really hit home. Im really messed up, Im 19 and iv never had a girlfriend, never kissed a girl, but i love women. I started fancying a girl in my social group, iv gone on and off her over the years but now she consumes my every thought. A couple of months ago now we had a "lets just be friends talk" i agreed and she said im a really nice guy, good looking and she would help me get a girlfriend. She means everything to me, she prefers confident guys and has had loads of boyfriends unfortunatly many have been guys i have known. The question echoes in my head, if she is so easy why wont she go out with me? when There Was A Time leaked, i cried very hard time and time again. I was always a big Guns n Roses fan but axl expressed my feeling so spot on and with such emotion and passion. I wanted her to know so i gave her a cd with the song. hoping she could hear the passion i felt for her.

Apparently the song said that i felt led on. and she was angry with me.

Since then her friend had a massive argument with me and the girl i love hates me.

All my 'friends' tell me to move on and find a new girl. But thats the problem i cant,  i have social anxiety so for example when i go to a club, girls see that im good looking and give me eye contact and smile. but when i go to talk i freeze im so nervous and i have sweaty hands all the time including now writing this (alone in my room).

I have recurring nightmares of her getting married to someone else.

Iv looked for help in the online seduction community some really cool guys, but they are all looking for sex with many women, i just want to love one girl and have her love me in return. www.fastseduction.com

Some days i cant believe iv survived another day without someone to love me, but each day comes and goes.

Iv asked her to give me another chance, i said i wasnt going to see her for a while, and im trying to be more confident. I changed my image and im trying to emulate her ex boyfriend e.g. very cheeky and playful with her.

I dunno yes im screwed obcessed scared alone sad despised friendless.

But if i gave up hope i guess i wouldnt be here.

It always sucks going through something like that, and it's even harder trying to give someone advice. I know you won't listen to this, I never do when I should either but it's the truth.  After having been through a couple serious relationships...and those relationships ending, I've thought why can't someone just love me?  But after time I've realized that it just wasn't meant to be....i was wasting my time loving someone that was never gonna love me back, and I finally realized that IT was a waste of my time, and my love for that person went away. You'll meet someone eventually, I truly beleive that everyone has "someone" out there for them. It's just a matter of time. And we being Gn'R fans...we should be used to that. lol. I for one can say I am finally truly happy. I am single, but I know it'll happen eventually, so in the meantime, just go out, have fun and live your life.

BTW...I've sent some CD's too....only mine had Back off Bitch and Locomotive...I guess your just a nicer guy than men, lol.

Im glad to see you have a more positive attitude than me. But if there is someone for everyone why do i know 40/50/60 year old men who havee never been loved? im terrified of being like that. Unfortunatly i have too much love to give and therefore i come across as too needy, as i say im really not bad looking. but she prefers guys who take control and treat her like shit. SO yes i am changing for her

did you peel the bitch off your back lol?

The blues at Birmingham made my bottom lip shake, axl jumped on the piano and let rip with "what this means to me is more than i know you believe" etc she is fast asleep now not caring, she can have any guy she wants. and hear i am up late work tomorow, wondering where and when that kiss will come.

I have a book by paulmkenna called Instant Confidence with hypnosis cd i should finish that course

I see that all time....these girls that I'm intrested in, ending up with these assholes that treat them like absolute hell...I just do not understand it. And they always say their not happy with them, but yet never leave them, so I have no clue. But I wouldn't try change who you are too fit what you thnk this girl likes. Always be yourself...I've been with a few girls that tried to be like how they thought I would want them too be...but in the end their true selves always show, and I actually would have liked them more if they would've just been themselves from the start.

As for the confidence thing, I do have a problem with that too, I am very shy, unless I'm drunk (I'm not saying go get drunk to fix things) I have my best luck when I'm not actually looking. I meet the coolest people when I'm at a party or something and we find out that we have something in common and we just start bullshittin, and it all leads from there.

I don't think you should settle for someone who's going to mistreat you. If she's not into you for all that you are, then you should hold out for someone better suited for you.

Also, girls attracted to men who treat them badly, have self-esteem issues.

Damn, 19! ?I remember 19, now I'm 32. ?Since hindsight is always 20/20, maybe I can be of some help. ?You, andypa1, have to come first. ?Get your direction in life. ?Make goals, both short-term and long-term. ?Make sure the short-term lead you to the long-term, then, just focus on the short-term, and be a focused engine. ?After you get on this road, focused on being the best person you can be both mentally and physically, you'll be amazed at what happens next! ?;) ?Chicks really dig guys who take pride in themselves. ?This doesn't mean you should be an arrogant asshole, although the haters may give you shit like that. ?Fuck them. ?Don't let negativity bring you down. ?It's just poorly-veiled jealousy.

Trust me, every guy on this board has been where you are right now. ?It's depressing as hell!It gets better though! ?I'm a firm believer in the old saying, "you must love yourself before you are truly able to love another." ?You sound like a really nice guy. ?I wish you all the best and I hope this helps!! ?Fastseduction.whatever isn't going to help you at all. ?

Last of all...getting with a chick sexually won't make you feel any better in the long-run. ?I've got a buddy who was banging this whore when he was 17 and 18 years old. ?She fucked his mind up pretty bad. ?He told her he loved her, and she just laughed at him. ?I think it took him about 10 years to get over that, but part of him was still revved up over that type of chick. ?I am in favor of meeting a chick who values herself enough not to throw her self around with a ton of guys. ?You'll have a much more fulfilling relationship with a chick when you make that mental connection first. ?So how does it all get started? ?That brings us back to the andypa1 focused on making andypa1 the best andypa1 he can be! ?After that, it just happens! ?In the future, after you learn about yourself, you'll be more likely to make that eye connection, smile, and be yourself, rather than someone you are not. ? :yes:

I think some chicks on this board should give you a cheers! ?Nice guys deserve love too! ?
 :beer:

I agree!  Cheers sweetpea!!!   :beer:   :beer:   :beer:

hey andypa1, you're like me. I'm 19 and never had a girlfriend either. I've sought many girls but never got any luck, I'm not ashamed though. Before I would get really depressed about it. Don't ever let other dudes make you feel lower than them just because they have a girlfriend and you don't.

right now i am sorta depressed.just family gets me down on myself mostly.thinking im going overboard about axl all the time.puts me in a bad spot looking bad sometimes.i do have to live my life as anyone else too.but find my mind allways wondering about axl.im not quite sure what kinna spell it is but dammm i like it lol.my sister said she was going to have me commited over it.and i just thought,yeah get your self looked at first.you little druggie.looks who's talkin huh.im not giving up so fast on axl.so she can get over it right now !

So.... um, you're obbsessed with him?? ????



Not healthy? ?:no:

I haven't  : ok:

Anyway if you can't get fish you better check your bait.

Really getting a girl ain't that hard, just go out and don't try too hard and make her laugh.

Okay, so everybody except for Blue Cut has wanted to be with someone but couldn't...for whatever reason.  ;D   Blue Cut, you crack me up!  :peace:

NO  im not obsessed really.just infactuated with him.he turns me on terribly lol.

Get a hobby.

Yup im really a huge fan of axl, mainly because of the powerful man he can be on stage. But also what has happened with Steph, although i have never been out with the girl i love so much, i have invested all my emotions in her. and i feel lost. there is 1 girl on the planet who has taken an interest in me, but she has loads of male friends and im prob just another, but shes not had a boyfriend before. i get on well with her, but i will see how it goes.

Thank you for all your kind words.

Prob is i have 'been myself' for 20 years now and it hasnt worked. Isnt that enough warning that i need to change. However i will take your advice and improve myself as much as i can/

here (http://psychforums.com/)  you could find some people who understand you and listen to your problems:

psychforums.com

there are forums for bipolar disorder, anxiety, social phobia and other things that might intrest you. plus links to diffrent sites where you can find out if you really are bipolar or it's just a severe depression.

There's nothing wrong with being who you are. You shouldn't change for all the wrong reasons for someone who doesn't appreciate you in the first place. You'll just be cheating yourself.

It's ok if you haven't had a relationship yet. A lot of people don't experience their first real love relationship until they're in their early 20s. Besides, everything happens when it's supposed to happen. Don't stress about it.


Starting out as friends is always the best way to go.

i do fishing down the NJ shore.but it's way to hot now for that.maybe when the weather breaks im going to more.

buuuu????haaa!!
 : ok:

Get two hobbies.